Acceptance and approval are strong motivators. The desire for approval and the nod of pride from someone you respect can keep you at work longer than a high paying check. Job satisfaction and company moral is much higher based on how a person feels about how they are doing and how they are being perceived more than how much they are getting paid.

In social situations as well, the need for belonging and feeling needed are strong enough motivators to inspire mediocre attitudes to rise to the occasion. Shine the light on them, make them feel included and part of the group and you will inspire loyalty, kindness and bonds of friendship. In our day and age of the E-world, people who can span the distance by virtue of the net are not spending quality time in the real world with friends, family and the people who are important to them. They crave companionship. They crave fun, social bonding. They want to play.

The world is in a financial stuggle. The cost of gasoline has us scrambling to find new ways to budget our cash yet we buy Iphones, video games, the latest "WE" -toys for grown ups. What ever one of "us" have, the rest must head out to purchase and the dominoes fall until the rest catch up.  Hey, the *Jones* of our parents day wouldn't stand a chance trying to keep up with us now.

Bigger and better and funner and finer. Until we hit the wall. Then we yearn for simpler and easier and quieter and cheaper. But we still want to belong. We don't want to be simple and quiet all alone.

What's a Sneech to do?

We will chat more about this complex problem in part two.  In the mean time...

How do you find the balance? Do you find yourself more on the simplicity side or the keeping up with the crowd side? Do you experience the feeling of being left out in the cold, of wanting to belong but watching from the sidelines? Do you feel like you need to buy your way in? Or have you just walked away from it all?

Action on Elder Abuse is calling for minimum standards of hydration for those in care homes in the UK. The group notes that one care home’s program encouraging residents to drink eight to 10 glasses of water a day resulted in the number of falls dropping sharply.

“It’s amazing that something as simple and straightforward as water could have such wide benefits for care home residents, including a reduction in falls, better sleeping patterns and less agitation,” said Gary Fitzgerald, chief executive of Action on Elder Abuse.

Home Instead Senior Care CAREGivers help their clients by making sure they stay hydrated.  "We've taken on clients who showed signs of dementia when the problem was that they simply needed to drink more fluids.  This client wasn't a big fan of water, so we worked in more water-based soups and flavored waters that they found tasty," says Carol, a Home Instead Senior Care CAREGiver.  "It made all the difference in the world."

To learn how a Home Instead Senior Care CAREGiver can help your loved one, call 248-203-2273.

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]]> http://liquidoxology.wordpress.com/2008/07/04/we-die-of-broken-hearts-as-in-your-funeral-is-coming-up/ Sat, 05 Jul 2008 02:44:58 +0000 liquidoxology http://liquidoxology.wordpress.com/2008/07/04/we-die-of-broken-hearts-as-in-your-funeral-is-coming-up/ Did you know that your heart rate changes when someone touches you? Just the touch of a hand on top of your hand. Or a hand on your shoulder. Even if you don't notice.

Ibn Mas’ood (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allaah (may Allaah bless him and grant him peace) said, “None of my companions should convey to me anything regarding another because I desire to meet everyone one of you with a clean heart.” [Abu Dawood and at-Tirmidhi]

Commentary: ‘Should not convey to me anything’ here signifies anything undesirable or that which is harmful for the person concerned. Thus, this hadeeth stresses that defects of people should not be unnecessarily reported to those who are at the helm of affairs.

Seriously, doesn't WALL-E look like the little brother of Johnny 5?

The movie is a joy to watch. Amazingly, there's very little dialogue. That doesn't hinder the storytelling one bit, as body language and expertly pitched robotic hums and whirrs substitute for words nicely.

The movie is set in the year 2700. WALL-E is a robot whose programmed directive is to collect and compact trash on Earth (WALL-E is an acronym for Waste Allocation Load Lifter Earth-Class). Seven hundred years ago, all humans left for outer space because all the trash they accumulated made Earth uninhabitable. Left behind by the humans who built him, WALL-E daily carries out the task of gathering trash and arranging them neatly in skyscraper formations. He is perhaps the only functioning unit left.

While gathering trash, WALL-E keeps an eye out for items to add to his collection of knick-knacks. Among the trinkets he's found are a Rubik's cube, replacement parts for other WALL-E units, and a jewelry box (minus the jewelry). His most prized possession is a videotape of the movie "Hello Dolly." It's obvious he's watched the movie over and over again. His favorite scene is where the male and female lead characters reach for each other's hands. WALL-E longs to hold the hand of another, but alas, he is all alone on Earth except for the companionship of a cockroach (and they don't really have much in the way of hands to hold).

One day, a large spaceship lands on Earth and leaves behind another robotic unit named EVE. As the name implies, EVE is feminine in features, although she is no pussycat. She packs enough firepower to demolish a freighter. You could say EVE is a strong woman.

WALL-E develops a romantic interest for EVE. Finally! Another robot with hands he could hold! As one might expect in movie-land, EVE is not initially swayed by WALL-E's gestures of courtship. There is good news though, as the two do eventually end up together. I will leave the rest of the plot for you to discover and enjoy on your own.

The metaphor of holding hands highlights one of the themes in the movie: Loneliness and Companionship. As the only one of his kind left on Earth, WALL-E feels an immense desire to show affection toward another and to have that affection returned. That's why he longs to hold hands with someone else. As he watches the actors on Hello Dolly hold hands, he interlocks his own robotic claws together, mimicking what he sees. He has no one else to hold hands with for real. You can feel the gnawing emptiness of being alone. It's an incredibly poignant scene.

The scene makes me think of Genesis 2. There we find Adam, the only human alive on Earth, and incredibly lonely. After searching among the creatures God created, no suitable helper could be found for him. So finally, God creates woman out of man. At last, there is a person who can make Adam feel complete.

I find it striking that the story of Creation includes in it such a strong emphasis on companionship. It reminds me that human beings are relational in nature. We have built into us a natural desire to be connected to others -- people who can understand us, sympathize with us, care for us, and be willing to receive affection from us. Being human means being related to someone else. We were not meant to live in a vacuum. God designed us that way.

God also designed us to want to desire a relationship with Him. The voice in us expressing that desire may be soft or loud. Sometimes, it is muffled or even suppressed. But it is there. If only we stop and listen, we'll hear it. We all long to have a hand to hold, both in the physical sense and spiritual sense. How wonderful it is, then, that we may say of our God and Maker: "Yet I am always with you; you hold me by my right hand." Psalm 73:23. Our God always has His hand out, ready to grasp ours.

I thought and lived in the belief that love can never happen to me again. I just couldn’t behold the beauty of anything. I would look at those in love, smirk and look up at the sky. You know whom I was cursing.

But me being the person I am wanted to give it one more chance and so I did. The thing that couldn’t get one more chance was my voice that always pottered my feelings. I could never speak up my feelings howsoever small or big they were. But for the world to know I was never dishonest, never taking the other person for granted.

I realized that I wasn’t helping it by being quite but I made sure my actions say it all and mean it all. I never spoke my heart out and will never, though I know people only hear what they want to hear. So Hell!

At this decisive juncture of my life I was very sure that I don’t want love to happen to me. Love was kept safe aside, only for my soul mate, the person who will spend her life time with me. I wanted companionship. Till today I just want a companion to have all the worldly conversation with me. A companion to talk shit, a companion to talk sense, a companion to give and take sarcasm, poor jokes and share the lighter & frustrating moments of life.

The irony of my life is strange and feels really awful. Every girl with whom I enjoyed candid conversations or coffee sessions, was quick and judgmental enough to write me off as “falling in love with her” or term my interests & curiosities jointly as “fascination for her”. I know I’m a little indecisive in life and get influenced a little too fast but those are no bullshit reasons to term my liking, my involvement as love.

There can only be two fucking earthly explanations behind why people thought that ways. Either I was taking their shit too seriously or they were taking my sense too lightly. The Martian explanation can be that I was the only good thing that ever happened to them.

I still did not speak. My words are too unaffordable for the world and most of its people in particular.

Why do people never understand that everything in life has a gestation period? I believe that the gestation period of love is called companionship. The problem with companionship is that on the face, it’s a lot like love but let’s not throw around the word “Love” because love is too strong an emotion. Love…..it all starts with companionship.

If all those girls ever happen to read my shit, I want to tell them that love is not judgmental. I was always more than ready to give you my company in all the good and the bad things of life but you shouldn’t have thought that I will give you my love in spur of a moment or probably even after most amazing times spent together.  Intentionally or unintentionally, you made my love look “frivolous”. I wanted to spend endless time, listen to you, be the friend you always desired for but I never saw you touching your lips with mine. I never saw myself writing a poem for you, I never saw myself being committed to you forever. If I have ever liked you more than liking, be assured that it was mutual. Unarguably, love can happen between two people anytime but there is a lot of companionship before that. There are a lot of trials and tribulations before that. Hope all of it happens to me for real, for sure. Amen!

The day I behold your beauty in my eyes, in my heart and in my mind, will be the day I will be on my knees looking up to you. Either you’ll be my God or you’ll be my soul mate.

Traumatic brain injuries due to falls among Americans 65 and older caused nearly 8,000 deaths and 56,000 hospitalizations in 2005, according to a new Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) report. Brain injuries accounted for half of these deaths. 

Most people think older adults may only break their hip when they fall, but research shows that traumatic brain injuries also can have serious consequences, said Dr. Ileana Arias, director of the CDC’s National Center for Injury Prevention and Control.

While falls are not an inevitable consequence of aging, they do occur more frequently among older adults whose health and aging conditions are associated risk factors.

To help prevent these injuries, the CDC developed the “Help Seniors Live Better, Longer: Prevent Brain Injury” initiative for seniors, their caregivers and healthcare providers. It features easy-to-use materials in a concise question-and-answer format to help prevent, recognize and respond to traumatic brain injuries. The materials are available at www.cdc.gov/BrainInjuryInSeniors.

Manufacturers of "conventional" antipsychotic drugs will be required to make safety-related changes to prescribing information, or labeling, to warn about an increased risk of death associated with the off-label use of these drugs to treat behavioral problems in older people with dementia.

In 2005, the FDA announced similar labeling changes for "atypical" antipsychotic drugs.

Neither class of antipsychotic is FDA-approved for use in the treatment of dementia-related symptoms, which can include forgetfulness, poor memory, and an inability to recognize familiar objects, sounds or people. The drugs are FDA-approved primarily for the treatment of symptoms associated with schizophrenia. The decision to use antipsychotic medications in the treatment of patients with symptoms of dementia is left to the discretion of the physician. Such use is often called "off-label" use and falls within the practice of medicine.

For more information, see the FDA news release at http://www.fda.gov/bbs/topics/NEWS/2008/NEW01851.html.

Unlike genetic mutations previously linked to rare, inherited forms of early onset Alzheimer’s disease that can strike people as young as in their 30s and 40s, these variants influence an earlier presentation of symptoms in people affected by the more common, late-onset form of the disease.

The research team found that individuals who carry genetic variations that lead to higher levels of a protein called tau in cerebrospinal fluid have an earlier age of onset of Alzheimer’s disease than those who carry variants that are associated with lower levels of tau.

Marcelle Morrison-Bogorad, Ph.D., director of the Division of Neuroscience at the National Institute on Aging, said the study may help researchers understand why the disease begins earlier in some persons than in others.

Remember - Home Instead Senor Care prides itself in providing in-home non-medical personal care and companionship for seniors living with dementia, essentially making it possible for folks living with Alzheimer's to live at home and maintain their quality of life.  To find out how a Home Instead CAREGiver can help you, call our office at 248-203-2273.

For more information on the study, read the news release at http://mednews.wustl.edu/news/page/normal/11867.html.

“It is uncertain whether the relationship between rest/activity circadian rhythms and mortality in older people is casual, or whether rest/activity circadian rhythms represent a potent biomarker related to increased risk of death,” said Misti L. Paudel of the University of Minnesota-Twin Cities.

Researchers at the University of California-San Diego assessed 2,226 women ages 60 and older for use of sleeping aids, daytime sleepiness, napping, insomnia, early morning awakening, snoring, overall sleep quality and sleep duration, U.S News & World Report says. Based on the results, 20.8 percent of the women were categorized as “successful agers.”

“Our findings reinforce the idea that good sleep is of utmost importance for good health,” said study author Sonia Ancoli-Israel. “Healthcare professionals need to ask their patients – of all ages – about sleep and help those with poor sleep to find ways for improvement.”

Download as wallpaper(click)

Few more words which go with Daffodius' quote. It speaks about love's integration.

When souls integrate…

Submissiveness unfolds,
And sacrifice begins.

Light of divinity spreads across,
And egos melt, become one.

Eyes see candles burning,
But heart feels presence of love.

Eyes see diminishing candles,
But heart feels living lives.

When souls integrate,
Love radiates and Life shines.

~ Joy Rad

Click on below thumbnails and explore the beauty of words

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LifeMantras archives

by: Andrew Mayoras, Partner, Barron, Rosenberg, Mayoras & Mayoras, and  The Center for Probate Litigation

 

Many people believe that once someone signs a Power of Attorney, for either health care or financial decisions, or a Patient Advocate Designation, then all control has been surrendered to the person designated to make decisions (called the Attorney-in-Fact or Agent). They feel that the rest of the family has no choice but to step aside. In reality, the appointment of an Attorney-in-Fact or Agent is often just the beginning.
 

First, a Power of Attorney or Patient Advocate Designation is only valid if it was executed in compliance with Michigan law. This means that it must be in writing, and properly dated, and met certain other legal requirements.
 
Second, and often more importantly, the person signing the document must have been legally competent at the time of execution. The test for legal competence is whether the person is of “sufficient mind to understand in a reasonable manner the nature and effect of the act in which the person is engaged.”
 
When the person signing the document has dementia or Alzheimer’s, often it is not easy to determine whether they were competent or not. Individuals suffering from these conditions have good days and bad, may be sharp and lucid one moment, and not the next. Medical records and opinions from doctors and experienced elder law attorneys are the most important ways to establish whether someone was or was not competent.
 
Third, even when dealing with a valid Power of Attorney or Patient Advocate Designation, the Attorney-in-Fact, or Agent, has a fiduciary duty to act in the best interests of the principal. For health care decisions, this means deciding on where to live and whom to provide care. These decisions should be based on what is best for the person in need of care, not what is most convenient for the Attorney-in-Fact. Often Agents want to make these decisions based on what will maximize their inheritance or what is easiest for them. This does not meet the Agent’s fiduciary obligation!
 
When families do not get along, visitation problems often arise. Sometimes, an  Agent-in-Fact does not want family members to spend time with their elderly parent or other loved one. Other times, there is complete isolation. These are often warning signs of abuse. Families should never passively accept these situations.
 
Other times, visitations are restricted for legitimate reasons, such as when another family member is verbally abusive or aggressive towards the elderly person. Disputes frequently begin around visitation issues, especially in second marriage situations and families who have unresolved sibling rivalries. Legally, the key always is what is in the best interests of the vulnerable adult. Frequent visits by loving and caring family members are usually in their best interests.
 
For financial decisions, the legal duty requires the Attorney-in-Fact to, at the very least, refrain from self-dealing. Although no Michigan case law has definitively addressed it, such an Agent-in-Fact must likely conform to Michigan’s prudent investor rule. This means that he or she must “invest and manage assets held in a fiduciary capacity as a prudent investor would” based on the terms of the governing document and the circumstances.
 
What does this mean? Simply, the Agent has a duty to manage the assets prudently, and with the goal of helping the person who owns the assets. Often, a person with Alzheimer’s or dementia requires much more conservative investments than he or she had previously chosen earlier in life. This may require a sale of stock or other securities, and insuring the portfolio is suitable, diversified, liquid and safe from extreme market fluctuations.
 
When the loved one has significant assets, following the advice of a credentialed, knowledgeable and ethical financial planner is essential to fulfilling the prudent investor rule.  But Agents must use common sense, too—just because a licensed stock broker or annuity salesmen recommends an investment does not make it suitable for a senior citizen with Alzheimer’s or dementia. In fact, it is unfortunate, but some financial advisors prey on elderly clients by selling them unsuitable, high risk investments that generate large commissions.  Those helping a senior adult with their investments must always be aware of this danger.
 
If you ever have doubts about whether a certain investment is appropriate, have it reviewed by a disinterested financial planner experienced in working with seniors, or an elder law attorney knowledgeable about spotting unsuitable investments.
 
What do you do if you believe that a Power of Attorney or Patient Advocate Designation is being abused, or that a vulnerable adult’s best interests are not being protected, either financially or otherwise? There are several options.
 
One is to talk to the family member you have concerns about. Sometimes, simply opening a dialogue can clear up misunderstandings. A second option is to file a complaint with adult protective services. Unfortunately, this approach usually does not work except in cases of extreme abuse, neglect or exploitation.
 
The best options are to either consult with an attorney experienced in dealing with issues of this nature, or to seek guardianship and/or conservatorship in probate court.  Our next article will discuss these proceedings.

 

  

As always, we appreciate your feedback. Should the links in this email not work, you can find our newsletter online at www.elderandspecialneedslaweletter.com.

Privacy -- To show my picture upfront or to hold back? -- I hold back. I just do not like the thought of my photo floating around. -- Nude pictures or not ? -- Depends on how you want your relationship to jump off. I did show nudes and I felt it revealed too much. Men got a little too excited and I felt my actions led him to not have respect for me. Where is the mystery? So nope I do not show nudes. Poise for greatness ladies. Honestly if he has a picture of you, men are creative. Let him put his creativity to use.

I am now in the process of trying to get some photos taken. Two "suggestive" shots at the most, well I do want to show what I'm working with don't I? The rest of the portraits will be glam shots and a full body shot as I have none! Setting up an arrangement via internet call for very nice photos. Gives you the chance to show your best features. I don't want all of the "air brushing" and "tweaking" . Natural. Because when I show up for our first lunching I wont be air brushed. Make-up is fine [not drag-queenish!] but photo alterations bad.

--Have you girls seen the Airbrush make-up on tv? It's such a light foundation for your face. So you never put on too much. I want that! [ click here for the site ]--

So where do I find someone to take a few free nice photos of me? The platonic section is where. Cross your fingers!

I am also busy replying to responses. What do I want? Someone to ease my mind and tell me :

"I would love to take care of you. I would also like to take the relationship slow at first. We can cover all the bases as the youth call it. I will help you move out here so don't worry about that expense. You can find your self a nice place to stay or I will. I will set you up on a weekly allowance and once our relationship takes that big step your allowance will too. And maybe just maybe by Christmas you'll get a really nice gift, hint "vroom vroom". I don't want drama, just a laid back classy young lady to spend some quality companionship time with"

Lol! Well I have my hopes right were they should be. My SD is probably right around the corner. "Hello dear"

http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/pressroom/08newsreleases/mortality2006.htm).

According to World Health Organization data included in an Associated Press report. Japan is No. 1 on the list for estimated life expectancy, with a life expectancy of 83 for children born in 2006. Switzerland and Australia were also near the top of the list.

Among the 2006 findings regarding U.S. rates: