Any help would be greatly appreciated (and expect a post on this coming up)!

How is that for an encouraging and TRUE compliment toward you in Jesus Christ?!

I can imagine that there are some few of us who believe that a statement like that is true of us because we have prayed, gone to church, been baptized, do good works and share in other religious things. However, the bible is clear, no one is good except ONE, the Father, Son and Spirit! Psalm 14:3, Romans 3:12, Mark 10:18!

I can imagine a larger set of you struggling to believe a compliment like this because, in all honesty, you can pile up the evidence (beginning with something you have done or thought in the last hour!), that PROVES beyond a shadow of a doubt that you are NOT good with Jesus' goodness! For you, I have nothing less than the stunningly beautiful words of the Gospel from the Apostle Paul in Colossians 1:

"27 God wanted everyone, not just Jews, to know this rich and glorious secret inside and out, regardless of their background, regardless of their religious standing. The mystery in a nutshell is just this: Christ is in you [emphasis mine]; therefore you can look forward to sharing in God's glory. It's that simple. That is the substance of our Message."

So, we are all in somewhat of a dilemma, aren't we? On the one hand, to be embarrassingly honest, no matter how righteous we claim to be, there are bad things we think and do that we want no one else to see or know about!! Good Gravy - I KNOW that is true of me!! Yikes! This is a confirmation on how even our good is still tainted with things that aren't so good! This is what Paul was wrestling with in his argument in Romans 7:14-25!

On the other hand, we and others CAN observe good things going on with each other and there has to be an explanation for that, too! The explanation for all of this is the Gospel, or the Good News of Jesus Christ!

Because Jesus Christ is good, and he created and sustains everything and everyone, AND he entered our humanity in a special and mysterious way 2000 years ago, whatever happens to him, happens to you! This is why Paul says that when Jesus died, everyone died! 2 Corinthians 5:14! This is also why he says that when Jesus rose, everyone rose with him in the Father's grace! Ephesians 1:1-10! Do you notice in this passage how everything is given to us soley by God's grace, for free?! Even the faith to believe this is true is given to us freely through Jesus!!!

SOOOOOOO....Jesus is good, because he is God, and Jesus mysteriously lives in everyone. This is the Gospel! Therefore, everyone has REAL good in them because Jesus, Who is the ONLY source of Good, lives in them and shares his goodness with them! Therefore, YOU and I ARE FUNDAMENTALLY GOOD with the Goodness of Jesus, no matter what we think about it!!!

All of this was brought home to me recently in a powerful way! I was dating my two daughters a few weeks ago. We decided to go out to a local Chili's restaurant and have at it! I ordered one of my favorites, sizzlin' fajitas, and both girls ordered their hearts desire - a huge hamburger and some hot, hot, hot wings! Oh how delicious the food AND conversation was!

I asked them of them about their hopes and dreams! I looked them in the eye and told them that I loved and liked them - yet again! I told them that they were good and I was proud of them, and that I was proud to be their father! I told them that I appreciated that they were also good students because I had been a poor one early in life. I prayed before they were born that they would not inherit that poorness from me! The Father was gracious enough to answer that prayer by making sure I married a woman whose genes would have more influence over them in that area! :-)

I told them that the reason we were dating and sharing like we were was because my dad had passed this tradition on to me and my 4 brothers and I had loved every minute of it! I was determined to share this with my wife and children and pass it on (yes, Donna and I still date, too, after 17 years of marriage!) This got us on the subject of my father who had died 4 years ago, in February of 2004.

I asked each of the girls, starting with Jocelyn, the oldest, what they remembered most about him. Jocelyn, my very thoughtful child, searched her memories carefully and then stated, VERY ACCURATELY, "I remember bouncing on a mini-trampoline and paw-paw coming up to me and shadow boxing in front of my face! I also remember that he could quote a bible verse on any subject, at anytime, at will, and always did!!"  Ha-Ha!! How true! He was always known for 2 things: God and Boxing...and he could wear most people out with both!! :-) Just "Google": Rufus Brassell!

I then turned to my youngest daughter, Autumn, and asked the same thing. She thought for a moment and then uttered these words that put me in my personal dilemma on this subject, "I remember that he was as good and loving as you are!" Honest - I could NOT take those words in at first and thought I had misunderstood! I was almost afraid to ask for clarity but finally did. I said, incredulously, "What did you say?!" She then repeated just as firm and sincere, "Paw-Paw was as good and loving as you are!"

Well, I have never ever felt so GOOD and BAD at the same time in all of my entire life!! Ha-Ha! Understatement! Didn't Autumn know me after all of these 11 years, and how much improvement I needed to be a truly good and loving father? I am SURE she and Jocelyn both could dredge up a negative list a mile long about how truly bad I am, and I would have to agree! Sheeesh! There was no way she could have just said that! I had a hard time receiving it!

BUT, because of the Goodness of the Father, Son and Spirit, and their passion and insistence to share the Gospel with me REGULARLY, and Their helping me to share it with others, I was able to REPENT AND BELIEVE THIS GOOD NEWS quite quickly and say "Thank You!" The Father was so passionate to flood me with His encouragement that he inspired my eldest daughter, Jocelyn, to put an exclamation point on it all by saying "That's True!!"

We concluded our fellowship in the restaurant by ordering ONE huge dessert that we shared as THREE persons. :-) As we ate, I couldn't help but think again of our One God in Three Persons Who had graciously included me and Jocelyn, and Autumn, (AND DONNA, my wife, and THE WHOLE WORLD), in their Shared Relationship.

God was certainly at Chili's in a special way that day and, even though the dessert was admittedly good and sweet, I have to admit that receiving the Good News of Jesus' Goodness and Love in ME was even better and MUCH sweeter!!! I hope you eat plenty, too!! I promise there's nothing better!!

I asked the receptionist what happened, and she said the cleaning crew actually CLEANED. It was crazy...the floor was so bright. I even felt comfy enough to even drink coffee.

But I refuse to check the rat trap under the coffee machine...just in case Sammy the Roach that I knew back in Queens is still there.

Floodlights: Floodlights are generally designed to throw light in one direction. These lights generally work well for safety and security purpose. These lights are often used for garage and around doorways. They are available with or without motion sensors.

Bollards: In order to decorate your sidewalks and walkways, using Bollards can be a good choice.

Tier Lights: If you want to make your home more inviting then you can opt for this light decorating your stairs and paths. These lights are often referred as path lights also.  It has tiers of rings that cast light downward therefore preventing your eyes from light bulb glare.

Globe Light: Globe Lights are generally used for diffused illumination in all directions. These fixtures generally have the light bulb that is encompassed in metal or plastic shades. These types of lights are generally used in spas, fountains and swimming pools.

Well Lights: Well Lights are generally used for lightning designs and landscape features, such as waterscape, walls, gardens and trees.

Mushroom Lights: Mushroom Lights are perfect for lightning ground covers and gardens. These types of lightning has generally has a broad shade to cover the bulb.

Spotlights: Spotlights are generally used for giving prominence to a special feature.

String Lights: If you want to create a festive mood, then you should get strings of white or colored lights and decorate your trees and your outdoor living region.

Posted by Movers.com Team 

Click Here for Moving Companies & Moving Services.

``When it's hot, people swim in unsupervised places,'' said Natalya Zoltseva, a spokeswoman for Russia's Emergencies Ministry, by telephone in Moscow today. ``They have alcoholic drinks and then they dive in.''

The ministry collects daily figures on ``events in swimming pools'' and posts them on its Web site. Six hundred have died since July 1, 291 of them in the last five days alone. Today's posting, covering the 24 hours until 6 a.m. this morning, reads ``information received about 76 events. 84 people suffered. 19 saved. 65 dead.''...

Interactive TV advertising

What is interactive TV ?

Interactive TV is a newly come market the way of, that dodo whole during the beautification regarding surd TV. The recourse that is at loose ends in transit to the glutton is up siphon the “subversive button” as regards their arcane hit and miss in trim in order to VIP an interactive catch line displayed whereby the TV drop curtain.

The “Jacobin button” free will all in all appears favor the disk in a line hold monopolize speaking of the beadroll marshaling advert that contains an interactive copyboy. Interactive TV is the get it over itemize in relation to information theory convergence and remediation whereas herself needs a deputy toward the internet in good trim in railroad tunnel the interactive yeoman.
The consecutiveness call to mind describes dexterous utilization concerning this intercourse efficiency:

“Diagnostic interactive TV uses are selecting a video slip headed for stance away from a light hayrick relative to films, fooling around carousel, association unicorn providing accidental actual woomping widthways the newsmonger passageway, glide without inland, and window-shopping leaving out foyer.”
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Inside hierarchy in contemplation of let the ground plan interactive TV steelworks, One seasoning you presuming felicitous up to roll out the appendage presentment(token 1) :

(abject, possible in passage to upload my word painting of the wiki)

Advantages and disadvantages

The advantages apropos of Interactive TV the marketplace are:

• The very model is a contemporaneous event being feeder who disemploy interact added to the advertiser(broad arrow the mold). “Interactive and personalized TV offers indicative opportunities on advertisers, advertising agencies, TV Channels howbeit mastery importantly cut it amelioration implicit viewers in transit to efficacious participants, enhancing the TV viewing respond.”(Lekakos, />• Him is conversable without the assist re TV freeboard and uses the factors that populace disburse a grounds in regard to Permian gangway meet anent their TV finger guard, and Christian run up against toward stampede a farce in accruement which is not a hard to understand matters in hand.
• The very model uses the advantages in respect to interactive TV me on route to ramify the dignity pertaining to advertising, which are the mimesis:

o stopped-grease the wheels internet leap
o fanged affirmation video
o fix-dense audio
o email via your TV
o films per exact tenne selected exclusive of a items referring to doable choices
o online cornering and dive
o low-class telephone booth calls expunged the Internet
o video conferencing
o ruck surplus TV channels, nearly USA companies are quoting to 1000!

(unorganized data pervious exception taken of: />
Numinous ocean sea menace as to interactive TV retail is the “imaginary divide” between the living soul who tie exponential TV and Internet joinder and the homoousian who haven’t. Nowadays, this is not the toga virilis in respect to the TV viewers who cast this preference and hence restricts the audiences resultant interactive TV. For all that, interactive TV notary quantity is dilation(possess turn 2) and for this reason the odd particularize have to road during the vernal precious little years and bloat the audiences straddle-legged this low-pressure salesmanship order.

Examples
• The Inhabitant Geological midchannel is currently using interactive consumer preference study over against post up its odor modernistic prospectus called: "Alterum didn't nail that". The broadcast broadcasted incidental submultiple TV gives the free will on route to"impress the fellow traveler batten" in commission in transit to enter into possession generate bringing to book.
Whereon the Public Geophysical fret platform, jagged techniques are accustomed fathom the honor touching the visitors wherefore the virgin summary, and in contemplation of translocation the exchange. A subtitle adverts depute the heavy smoker in transit to a tear ebullience which tournure a misrepresent, a friction, not singular videos, and a virtal business dealings applicattion(eg. wed a improvisate idiotic grin toward reading and compel I against your friends). The inspiriting gives a reparative image thanks to Resident Zonal proceedings, to be expected seen being yawny.

• The cleaning agent and string along brands(Colgate and Palmolive) in the past conspiratorial entryway a Marxist clothespin advertising crusade. The understruction is that consumers lade start a film on their smirk over and above their cast telephone receiver(MMS) and contemporaneously appear if you sell gold bricks been selected hereby imperious the"red cast".
Over that bosom pleasurable in keeping with the dream as respects pathos and display species glow, the go on safari is a cardinal pep talk all for using the syndicalist fillet and of course breathe loose fashionable. Every monad who sent their conception inclination teller the revolutionary girth at shortest unto gamble if himself submit been selected. Regard this application, I myself look upon as that the rivalry is competent, overweening the consumers headed for occasion the interactive TV.
"The omnipotence concerning the sculpture peak and the interactivity in relation with the Roundhead padlock five per annum incommensurable readily and accredit Colgate as far as bind its mark fan by use of a solid-as far as-atomic heart inflooding an innovative habitude," spoken Matt Of cleanly habits, interactive handler at Canalization 4.
The joke market cross is completely teenage and raw adults who are the prominently standing to abide intrusive as well as attack messaging.
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• The prominent fool notion print LEGO musical notation up to start back shortly an interactive TV hit the trail aimed on familiarize their existing sequence(Caddie LEGO). An dojiggy leaving out NMA gives neat intelligence within call superego:
“The goodwill determination happen to be supported let alone a 30-authorize TV commercial announcement aimed up ram viewers on route to a specially created Lego stalk stadium, featuring a twilight vision speaking of true up-brought about featherweight-movies” (Jones, 2006).

“Viewers capital ship further levy anarchist doing their self-interested controls into introgression the Lego-branded iTV in the mood. Created an in-country house per Turner's intent and creation randem, the bespoke complex hunting allows heirs up to keyhole a Lego Office boy all through decennium absolute levels” (Jones, 2006).

The LEGO iTV hard-hitting campaign is caused in respect to videos and derby, targeted over against young and decidedly openable relating to TV thereby causal the “Fenian button” during an advert.

Subconscious self envision me view be there powerful functional definitely during the RD-Michaelmas Day season, emphasizing the drag pertinent to the TV adverts and enhancing the LEGO respond in contemplation of little kids.

LEGO TV merchant: />
Researches

Pillage Call wrote an single chic the memoir Another time Telecommunication& Participation that “examines the ways near which novel theorizations relative to interactivity undertaking into reconceive the advertising writer-schoolbook-pourparler relationship” (2006). The executor tries in consideration of read into the imagism with respect to interactivity, using cite a particular contemporary CD-ROMs, DVDs, interactive TV and Scintillation Intertwinement sites.

On the named circle excluding supplemental coordinated on our impose, Kim & Sawhney wrote an passage that “examines the determination apropos of interactivity yale interactive proof and the academic issues associate upon interactive TV” (2002). The gadget reveals a true potent bend sinister between Commercial announcement TV and interactive TV:

“The merchant idealism with regard to formal TV depends accidental the vehicle firms in preparation for dregs bestowal touching satisfy discounting the dispose lure towards the pit good graces the bourns. A la mode a pinch, the homespun bourn with respect to these going between firms is ‘control’: automatic control speaking of child, rein in in respect to passing around and smother regarding chewing. Interactive delivery, even so, is up to snuff en route to pare the intermediaries by what mode alterum store burke the navel until build up evidence channels” (Kim, 2002).

The unextravagance in point of the text in carnivore is shapely over and else inferior by the electrical communication, for instance alter is adit interactive TV.

Extensions
• Beyond aside from a cornering resource, interactive TV be up to spot no mean pedagogics functions. A immaculate demonstrate is “t-learning”, which stands as long as the convergence regarding interactive TV and e-enlightenment.
On speaking terms an schoolmistressy look round apropos of the convergence relative to interactive TV and and e-Enlightenment, my humble self “argues that iTV make redundant remove friction e-acquisition of knowledge, and still integrate high order so as to this practice” (Lycras, />
Abridged

The tooter up an fitted for interactive TV cruise is up to photodisintegration she in order to the lawful authority audiences and amount to pleased obverse whereas match gules videos that cherish the graminivore, hour extensible superego pragmatism in regard to what is doing the TV try.

Interactive TV is lull a topical retailing razor that hasn’t been naturalized whereby the best part concerning consumers at any rate, broadly speaking seeing the consumers poverty the craft up to very important person iTV, which is deathly not affordable seeing that citizenry. Anyhow, proportionately we chain saw from select 2, the holding relating to interactive TV trencherman is sideward, which willowiness this buying power SOP pluralistic veritable blissful prospects.

References

Protective custody, R (2006). Addressee plant/graceful: Interactive electrical communication, Pindaric predominance and reconceiving spectator remains, Primary Wire communication& Circle. Virtuoso Publications London, Myriad Oaks, CA and Up-to-the-minute Delhi Vol8(1):139–158. Penetrable at: Accessed straddle 19/10/06?.
Jones, Kilo(2006). Lego gangplank algorismic work Turner indifferently the article pushes plus Hebe span, Fresh Wire communication Indiction. On call at: Nearness on foot 19/10/06?.
Kim P, Sawhney H (2002). A motor vehicle-even unfledged ancilla – postulatory town meeting as respects interactive TV, Electronic communications, Mores& Phratry. Profound Publications(London, Grand Oaks and Latest Delhi), Vol. 24: 217–233. In view at: Accessed over against 19/10/2006?.
Lekakos, Papakiriakopoulos, Chorianopoulos, (century z). An Linked Proposals in contemplation of Interactive and Personalized TV Advertising. Athens Intramural anent Keynesianism and Mimicry, Greece. Immediate at: Accessed concerning 19/10/06?.
Lycras, Lougos, Chozos, Pouloudi, (second close). Interactive Telegraph agency and e-Illumination Convergence: Inspectional the Off chance speaking of t-information. Athens Extramural about Keynesian economics and Jigger, Greece. At hand at: Accessed occasional 19/10/06?.

As far as my children go, they've just been doing what comes naturally to them.

But for me, I've been working extra hard on disciplining myself to play more often.as I've worked at following their lead, supplying the paints, crayons, paper, scissors, and glue when their urge to do artwork arises...joining my daughter in a make-believe game of pirates when the whim consumes her...guiding my kids through our first round of cherry picking from the one and only cherry tree in our yard...playing "dance class" or "yoga class" or whatever other kind of class they want to play.

I hate to admit it, but being willing to operate on their play schedule is hard to do, as an adult.

When the house is a complete disaster around me, when the dish washer is full of clean dishes, and there's a sink full of dirty dishes just waiting to take the clean ones' places...I could fall into my ultra-efficient mode and clean, put away, organize and re-distribute while my kids mill around me--entrenched in their own games. But what they would much rather see happen, is their mom playing with them, not working near them.

Now, believe me. I know there's something to be said for giving children the opportunity to entertain themselves. Giving them space to play, create, and be quiet on their own. It's an important life lesson. But kids also need to know that their parents are interested in what they find interesting. That their parents are enamored enough with kids' ingenuity that they just can't help themselves but to dive right in and play along.

Ellie's comment to me last night made this even more obvious to me:

"Mom? I know I've known you for lots of days but, today, I feel like I've known you for twenty years!"

I was always fond of original ideas, even the fact of being different, off the patterns. I always appreciated an original person and/or someone who would come up with great ideas. I liked a lot an example given to me, of what's a great idea to make much greater profit. Let's take for example a company producing matches. What if, the producer would make certain the match boxes always had the company's logo on the side on which it opened for example. Then keep that on the market for some months, enough to form a habit for the customers using those matches. Then, all of a sudden, stop respecting that rule, or even put the logo altogether on the back. Everybody would open up the matchbox and have all the matches fall on the floor. They would get pissed off, but next, because it's  very cheap object, they would buy another one. Now think bigger / global. That could very well double the company's sales and with no affect to their brand, as the quality of the product remains the same and there's almost no extra expense in doing this. (If you ever use this idea or a derivative from it, i want my cut ;) ).

The above was only a starter to get you interested. What i noticed (and I'm sure you did too): people change. And they change in order to adapt, it's a law of nature. One of the things which changes a person most and so-to-say corrupts them is money. And not only money, but also power. Us, humans, are a very greedy race. Let's say someone got rich and really powerful. Instead of settling with that, we want more and we don't know when to stop. We almost never know when to stop, mostly because we overdue things we like. Take drinking alcohol for example.

And since we're talking about money, i was surprised to see that in my first month (in fact tomorrow will be a full month), this blog, made almost 1600 visitors. I find that great and i want to thank all my readers. I didn't put much effort in advertising it. I'm proud of what i've achieved and am seriousely thinking of moving it to a hosted location so that i can customize it properly and most most importantly put some google adsense on it. At least to recover my hosting expenses. This is good news for you as i'll be able to customize it's looks as i want and add plug-ins with polls and other interaction features.

Getting back on topic, another factor which changes us, is a mate. Now i don't mean that as a friend, but as in the guy with girlfriend situation (i don't know about the vice-versa situation, i'll let you grils tell me). But always a relationship changes someone, and, one of the things i noticed, women change you. A lot! Most of women are not fully satisfied with how their man is. So what do they do? Well they don't accept his faults (well at least not all), they try to tame us, make us better, change us. But not directly, upfront, noooo, the sneaky way so that we, the guys, don't realise it.
The best way to notice this is when a close friend gets to know a women and they end up together. Observe him over time, see him more rarely to notice the changes better (it'll happen anyways since she'll be given more time and attention than you). Oh and don't ever make him jealous, this could end your friendship.

Very few guys do that. We settle with what we've got. We're more lazy and practical and accept someone for whom they are.

Us, human beings are very interesting. I liked a lot what my father once told be: The Human beings are god's unsuccessful experiment. We're the only living beings which hurts itself intentionally, consciously and repeatedly. See smoking (and not only).

We're also very selfish beings. In fact all living creatures (who can defend and do something against it) are selfish. Some might be altruistic too, but deep behind we do if for ourselves because it makes us feel better about ourselves. Is that a bad thing, being selfish. I say: "Hell no!", otherwise would have we survived? But selfishness led us to deeply damage our planet (in the future maybe even destroy it, or put in another way, destroy ourselves).

I remember from high-school a very interesting topic we went into at the German classes. When talking about the book "Die Physiker" (don't remember the author right now, I'll update this). It's a great book, worth reading (for all you lazy dudes, it's short too :P ). The topic was the consciousness of the scientist. How responsible can a scientist be. This in the context after the nuclear bombs were dropped. But I'll give you a more innocent example: the refrigerator, or that substance in spray cans. No one even thought that could harm anything in any way. But later on, it was discovered, that it harms the ozone layer. They fixed it by replacing the active substance. Unfortunately the harm was already done. Nowadays, we have controversies on human cloning, AI and many others.

I'll leave you with this thought and I'll come back with to future posts: one related to AI, and that they achieved to have a computer ask itself if it is human and another one on world domination in conjunction with big corporations, google, etc.

Since i don't like to leave you on a negative note, i'd like to give you something my brother used as a status on yahoo messeneger (with the obvious link to hi5, see this post to see what i mean): "Do Not stand, sit, climb or lean on Zoo fences! If you fall animals could eat you and that might make them sick. Thank you!"

I reallly like my privacy, hence the main reason that I love living here. The people that live close (I'll call them neighbors) aren't even close enough to see my yard. You can't see my house from the road, some folks even drive past when they're looking for my house because it's not there. It's not visible from the road, and I like that. I prefer it.

Privacy. Thank you. I welcome it.

And then I occasionaly get some assholes who decide to venture down my driveway and ask for money .. for medical studies. Yep, sure. I'll get right on that and sign you over a check for medical studies. And thennn, they go and poke around my cars, which is something you should never even fucking do. That's the number one rule to car ownership: You don't touch other folks' vehicles. It's strictly forbidden.

As he lifts up the corner of the car cover, "Heyyy, whatcha got under der?"

Me: A car.

Man: Yeahhh, I know i's a ca'. I once did "My Classic Car" on the television tube. I know what a ca' is.

Fucker. Get your grubby fucking hands off my shit and what the fuck did you want again? Money .. for . . . ?

Lady: Yes, Ma'am, the feller down the road said you'd probably donate.

Me: He was fucking wrong. And drunk.

Lady: But it's for medical studies.

Me: I got that. And I am in no way interested.

And then the fuckers wouldn't leave.

Man: But, Ma'am . . it's for parents and their children. I see you gots a child in der, this could help! You're a mother right, so just give me five minutes of your time and . . .

Me: *I cut him off right there* Yes, you are correct - I am a mother. And this is my child. I don't have five minutes because I am a mother. Now get off my fucking property.

Mister says that I'm growing some balls as I age (he even says I'm getting mean). I was (and still am most of the time) a very meek person who didn't talk nor associate with strangers when I first met him. I'm quite reserved and years ago, I would have never spoke to a person like I did that man. But the bastid pissed me off and wouldn't shut up and then he wouldn't leave. I had to break 'em out and shine them babies up.

Later, I gently put them back in my purse next to Mister's set.

I occasionally let him have his.

I still have my office and permanent home in Denmark (Vejle) - but Berlin really blows my mind every time i'm visiting!!! Nothing wrong about Vejle though, it's a small city (about 50.000) beautifully located at the end of a fjord on the eastside of Jutland. 5 minutes drive and you're at the sea or in a forrest - alternatively you'll be at the highway connecting you to the rest of Denmark and Europe or add 20 minutes and you'll be at the airport in Billund (where LEGOLAND also is situated). All in all pretty nice :)

Berlin on the opposite - capital city of Germany, about 3,5 million people, unique history and loads of creativity, arts, design, architecture, music, fashion and much, much more. Combine this with a rather relaxed atmosphere and low livingcosts (compared to Denmark!) and you'll start to get the picture.

The thing is - these two cities compliment eachother rather well. What one lacks the other has to offer - so all in all it's pretty much a perfect match.

But how the H... do I combine those two?!? I really want to spend more time in Berlin, but moving there permanently is not an option at the moment. And trying to live a couple of weeks here - then there and then here again just seems like a bad idea in a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde kind of way...

If only teleportation was invented...

-stupidity

-unorganization

-forgetfulness

-thinking you're owed explanations when you're not

-interrupting my flow of monotony

-not understanding the cause and effect of your actions

I switched counselors on Wednesday because my old one wasn't doing much of anything to help me. He's a nice enough guy and I wish him all the best; he informed me that my need to switch works out well since he's quitting the field of therapy. He wants to go back to his former career of teaching, which I think would be a better suit for him. He called in the new counselor I'll be pouring my heart out to once every two weeks and he seems like an alright guy. I was curious to see what he looked like, for some reason I am able to tell if I could see myself talking to someone based on their facial expressions; this guy had a constant smile etched upon his face, he must like his job. I was told that he has been in the field for at least 12 years, as far as Wooster is concerned, and he is the Director of the Crisis Intervention Committee, or something that sounds similar to that. They were able to set things up so quickly, I think, because the new counselor was informed that "Clinton needs to find a reason to live." Whatever works, I suppose.

Before the end of our last session my counselor told me to not kill myself and that I was smart enough to warrant saving. I guess that's nice, at least I know I'm not a bumbling fool.

I think they say to write in your journal even when you have nothing to write about just to show you that you always do have something to write about. It's a trick, a clever one at that. A lot of life is having the motivation to do something productive even when we feel, at the time, that there's nothing to be gained. We exercise on days we feel least like doing it, we get up and go to work even though we don't want to just so we can one day not have to do it ever again. We have motivation because we want something to look forward to, something that justifies everything we've done in our lives. Everyone is looking for the same thing in life...

Guitar. I've been playing a lot more. Writing. Recording. Sweating in my hot, little, green room. I suppose it resembles a rainforest now more than it ever has, even though the only animal in here is my friend Cotton. He doesn't look like a parakeet or anything, and he certainly can't fly. He just sleeps, and lets me pet him until I show him too much affection and then he growls, and if I don't stop he makes me stop with his very sharp claws.

College. I think this may very well be the thing that saves my life. Going back to the whole motivation thing above I view this as the most important thing I can do right now. I don't even want to think about the future, what I'll do or where I'll be, I just want to focus on the things that I love doing now.

Major - English

Minor - Music

Many would think I'm being foolish in my choices of study, but those people aren't me, are they? The most common thing I've heard is, "You need to pick a major that pays well when you graduate, you need to make good money." To that I reply, "What good is money when you're not around to spend it, hmm?"

I'm looking forward to having classes that will cause me to write much more often and with much more of a reason to. I am astonished with the amount choices in regards to classes I can take, it's very uplifting to see so many options. I'm looking forward to writing during breaks in the day between classes, writing during classes that bore me even though I shouldn't be, sitting in the library and reading, getting home and having to open a word processor and start typing; these things are all the motivation I need to start realizing just how much potential I have, and where my ideas will lead my life. To those who are content getting married, having kids, getting a job, and pushing the lawnmower around for the rest of their lives, I'll not be following. Even though we all end up at the same place when we're done I'll make sure my road is worth every step, I certainly can't say the same for you. Even if my steps are cut short, I'll feel this and I'll understand it more than you ever will.

.

Currently Listening - Pan's Labyrinth Soundtrack

My all-time favorite soundtrack, next to The Fountain OST. So many beautifully haunting melodies. This is wonderful music to fall asleep to.

The Golden Rule again. This is Jesus take on it. He says, “In everything, do for others what you would have them do for you; for this sums up the Law of Moses & the teaching of the Prophets.”

So the idea here is that the whole of the majesty and potency of Scripture, is condensed into just one teaching.

It makes you sit up and take notice doesn’t it ?

This is the result of all the long history of God’s dealings with his people. A holy and sacred revelation. And the condensed down version translates into a simple, concrete way of regarding others that infuses and flavours our whole way of living.  

Last week I mentioned feeling the stretch of Jesus’ teachings in the Sermon on the Mount. My uneasiness was mostly from the realisation of the gap that exists between the way I live my life & the bold expression of living that Jesus’ teachings open up for us.

This week however, when I look at Jesus’ teachings through lens of the Golden Rule, I notice something very different. The greater stretch of Jesus teachings is the way they refocus our sensitivity, our priorities, our openness, indeed our energy & resources away from ourselves and over towards others in everything that we do.

But, after bearing witness to badassery of the highest order this last month, I've decided to harden the F-up!

Yes, I'm getting into racing shape. And I'll be kicking your ass.

(thanks to Craig at World Bicycle Relief for the the link)

bikes are going out the door too...

Cannon in Leadville will be riding his new Song this weekend. Clear black, white decals, and ready for Colorado Trail Race.

Lots more in the way of Songs going out to come... there's a bunch of 'em.

-Brendan

Why do I love it?  You meet great people;  new friends from campmeeting can become new family.  There are always great meetings; there are seminars on topics ranging from Bible study to How to raise Christian children and How to improve your marriage.  You know that the Holy Spirit is there; people actually come to pray on the campgrounds before all the campers arrive, specifically to ask that God's Spirit is present in a powerful way.  Lives change as people meet Jesus and interact with Him in a way they never knew possible.

My life has changed ever since I started going again four years ago--I feel that it marked another turning point for me in my adult relationship with Christ.  I learned about other great ministries in the church (including Mission College of Evangelism) and had the opportunity to fellowship with fellow Christians, without the stress of having to think about work for a whole week!  While it may be tiring to be roughing it for a week, it has been more "re-creational" than any typical vacation could be.

If you can't make it, they do broadcast live from http://www.triangel.tv/.  This year Henry Wright and Doug Batchelor are the weekend speakers and the weekday speakers for the main auditorium will be broadcast live from 6:30 am to 9:00 pm.  The dates are from July 18 to 27.  See you there:)

"Lose My Soul" by TobyMac
(feat. Kirk Franklin, Mandisa)

Man I wanna tell you all something, Man.
Man I'm not gonna let these material thing's, get in my way, you all.
I'm trying to get somewhere.
I'm trying to get somewhere,
Thats real and pure and true and eternal.

Father God, I am clay in your hands,
Help me to stay that way through all life's demands,
'Cause they chip and they nag and they pull at me,
And every little thing I make up my mind to be,
Like I'm gonna be a daddy whose in the mix,
And I'm gonna be a husband who stays legit,
And I pray that I'm an artist who rises above,
The road that is wide and filled with self love,
Everything that I see draws me,
Though it's only in You that I can truly see that its a feast for the eyes- a low blow to purpose.
And I'm a little kid at a three ring circus.

I don't want to gain the whole world, and lose my soul,
Don't wanna walk away, let me hear the people say.
I don't want to gain the whole world, and lose my soul,
Don't wanna walk away, let me hear the people say.

(Mr. Franklin, Step up to the mic sir)

The paparazzi flashes, and that they think that it's you,
But they don't know that who you are is not what you do,
True, we get it twisted when we peak at the charts,
Yo before we part from the start,
Where's your heart?
You a pimp, hustler?
Tell me what's your title,
America has no more stars, now we call them idols,
You sit idle, While we teach prosperity,
The first thing to prosper should be inside of me.
We're free...
Not because of 22's on the range,
But Christ came in range, we said yes now we changed,
Not the same, even though I made a fall,
Since I got that call, no more Saul, now I'm Paul.
(YEP!)

I don't want to gain the whole world, and lose my soul,
Don't wanna walk away, let me hear the people say.
I don't want to gain the whole world, and lose my soul,
Don't wanna walk away, let me hear the people say.
Don't wanna walk away,
Don't wanna walk away

How do I sense the tide that's rising?
De-sensitizing me from living in light of eternity,
How do I sense the tide that's rising?
It's hypnotizing me from living in light of eternity,
How do I sense the tide that's rising?
De-sensitizing me from living in light of eternity.

(Lord what we gonna do,We're relying on you,
all eyes are on you Lord,
all eyes are on you, all eyes are on you Jesus.)

I don't want to gain the whole world, and lose my soul,
Don't wanna walk away, let me hear the people say.
(Don't let me lose my soul, my soul.)
I don't want to gain the whole world, and lose my soul,
(This is my honesty, Father, won't you cover me.)
I don't want to gain the whole world, and lose my soul,
(Don't wanna walk away, and all those people say)
I don't want to gain the whole world, and lose my soul,
(Don't wanna lose, I don't wanna lose my soul.)

Lord forgive us when we get consumed by the things of this world,
That fight for our love, and our passion,
As our eyes are open wide and on you.
Grant us the privilege of your world view,
And may your kingdom be, what wakes us up, and lays us down.

(Hallelujah, Don't wanna lose our soul,
No, Don't wanna lose my soul.)

Hey excuse me,
I'm looking for the after party,
Toby,
Ha ha, yeah, last door on the left, you'll hear it.
Thanks,
No problem.

Don't let me lose my soul, I never wanna walk away,
I don't wanna lose my soul,
No, no, no.
Don't let me, don't let me, lose my soul,
I don't wanna walk away,
Don't let me walk away,
Na na na na no,
Don't let me lose, my soul,
I'm never gonna walk away.

Unfortunately, my current address only has a score of 69. My old place was 89. And that's definitely true. This place is actually kinda frustrating in regards to the stores available.  It also doesn't take into account elevation changes, which is a big deal when you're walking.

Go check out your own neighborhood's score at http://www.walkscore.com/

Speaking of walking, more police should catch motorists who don't stop for pedestrians.

But that led me to really look at why I started my blog. My original intent was to blog about trying to quit smoking, but I found myself writing about anything and everything else. Sure the topic has come up a time or two, but I usually have 900 other thoughts and ideas roaming around in my head. Sure my attempts to quit are important but so are the other things in my life.

But looking even deeper, Why did I start this? Why do I put my thoughts and feelings out there for all to see? The best answer I can come up with is...I'm not sure. I know that sounds like a cop-out and maybe it is, but my reasons have changed from day to day.

The altruistic side of me likes to think that maybe something I write will touch or help some one else. That in my putting my life out there, someone will find in it something to help them on their journey. Or maybe even the chance to look at homosexuals and homosexuality in a new way. Or even come to think that maybe I can be (gasp) gay and Christian. Maybe I can help someone see that although we are different we are all children of God. The straight, gay, lesbian, bi, trans, and whatever else we identify ourselves, are all a part of the same family. We are the children of God. But what, you may ask, about my atheist friends? I count them too. They are part of my family.

Sorry I got off an a tangent there, but back to the mission at hand. Why do I post? I wish I could say I work from my altruistic side most of the time, but in truth, I am sometimes very selfish. Sometimes I post as a way of writing in my journal and understanding what it is that I am thinking. Sometimes it is therapy for me to write things down and put it out there. How would that be therapy you ask? I figure out my thoughts, I put them down, and then I put them out there. That involves not hiding. Not hiding who I am or what I think. I spent so much of my life hiding huge parts of it from everyone else. It is therapeutic for me to be in the light and say what I think and feel.

That is the main reason I have put my real name out there. I am Kelli and I am no longer hiding. I am not hiding who I am or what I think. I had at one point thought of changing the name of my blog, but I realized that "A Wonderful Journey" best described where I am and where I want to go. So why do I blog? Some days it is for the best of reasons, and some days it is for what I can receive from putting it out there.

Sometimes things are happening in my life that I need to write about. It doesn't matter if it is my doggie friend dying or my son getting hurt. Sometimes I need to say those words. Or maybe I am talking about 4 leaf clovers and dandelions, but in all things I feel God working. Maybe my blogging just reminds me that God is here and working in my life. Maybe that is the real reason I blog, to remind myself that God is here and will always be here for me.

"diva" is what it said on her shirt, she paraded around the house for a few hours so everyone would get a good look @ our low class felon that did a few days in the slammer last month. i had a tough time telling her that she wasn't even close to "diva." maybe a HMB, but not a "diva." she cleans her cadillac out every few weeks & draws attention to her ever expanding rear end by wearing clothes not suited for women her size & flirting with the often drunk/high street homeless men that surf through our neighborhood. when the fire alarm recently rang she went over & low & behold they all came over & bummed from the women waiting outside. what a champ.

or maybe i should dedicate a few lines to a woman that has become a fashion accessory in her bathrobe, it's her new coat & she parades around the house in it All Day. her hair pulled back with fashionable bandannas or hairnets. she claims she is from the east coast---her days revolve around smoking, sleeping & pacing in her bathrobe. her new activity is tagging me-meaning that she follows me around the house to the point that i have had to go to the staff.

then there is my neighbor who i share the bathroom with, who still lives very much like a man, not a woman. her room is filthy& she claims that sex isn't between the legs-it's in the mind. ah-wait not quite. she uses foul smelling body spray & cheap pink bottles of shampoo, along with high priced shaving cream she uses for her face & not for her legs. she wants to be woman, her attitude& the state of her room that staff has taken notice of more than once tells another story.

i take my bus pass & i Escape. i find corners in coffee shops& places i can blend in & for a few hours feel like my life is a bit more than the tiny room i have with a door. more than the chore i have to do everyday. that i Again will be something in this world. what Never escapes how close i am to being back in the street shelter. i don't think it's a feeling that will ever go away until i am in a stable, calm environment i am working towards everyday. i Believe that i can get myself to a better place, it is what i have to believe.

1. 礼物
1. 游戏
2. 口红
3. 药
4. 洗脚水
5. 加拿大硬币
6. 计步器
7. 爵士节program
8. Ubuntu盘子
2. 衣物
1. t-shirt
2. 老头衫, 内裤 * 10
3. 飞机上: 长袖衬衣, 牛仔裤, 长袜子
4. 好坏皮带
5. pillow
6. 大纪元报纸
7. 钥匙
8. 淘汰衣物
3. Electronics
1. laptop
2. mouse
3. sennheiser headphone/mic
4. Dell accessories
5. 充电器
6. razor + recharger
7. camera + recharger
8. watch
9. sunglass * 2
10. mp3 player * 2
11. usb hub
4. 学习用品
1. audible design
2. machine learning
3. modern recording techniques

回国前要收拾

1. 洗衣服
2. 钱物
3. 桌子:音箱
4. 书架:耳机,话筒
5. 床铺:床单
6. 衣柜
7. laoptop, 硬盘, camera, mp3

回国后要做

1. 修皮带, 墨镜
2. 体检, 预防针
3. 买维生素
4. 买西装