Det var löningshelg idag. Jag började dagen med en nice körning till Norrtälje och fortsatte sedan med några Arlanda för att avsluta i stan bland alla lönslösande svenssons. Det var en ordinarie fredag som inte bjöd på några överraskningar. Till de körningar som nämnas bör är att jag träffade en otrolig trevlig tysk tjej som var i Stockholm för att hon helt enkelt gillade Sverige och svenskarna. Jag körde henne till ett hotel i Västberga. Hotellet ligger i ett industriområde och hon blev mycket negativt förvånad när hon märkte att hotellet var egentligen någon slags övernattning place för polska byggarbetare och kinesiska bärplockare. Stackaren vågade inte åka kommunalt så Taxikungen sträckte fram sin generösa hand och körde henne till stan. Helt gratis! Inte bara det, jag avslutade mitt pass genom att hämta henne och köra henne tillbaka till hotellet helt gratis. Glöm inte, pengar är bara pengar och saker är bara saker, det viktiga är människor! Hur som så ska hon tillbaka till Tyskland på söndag. Hoppas att resan går bra!

Jag kom att tänka på en sak, varför är alla Transfer chaufförer så otrevliga och oborstade? De borde gå en skrattkurs och kramas mer på jobbet. De verkar inte få nog med kärlek. Idag skrek en Transfer chaufför på sin bil! Den fungerade väl inte som den skulle och då var hysterisk utskällning på plats tyckte han. Man Vs Machine! Jag vet! Om ni åker med en Transfer taxi så säg till att ge grabbarna en kram.. de behöver det! Eftersom de inte har så många bilar så ska jag bifoga en bild på en av deras bilar.

Love Goddess: How are you guys? Today, we're talking about soulmates, so let's attempt at a loving and civil debate? 

America: I’m good! Let’s go for it.

Jayden: I’m doing great, but excuse my curiosity, can you tell me what the fuck is a soulmate? Aren’t these people nut cases you want to run away from?

Love Goddess: Typically, the real nut cases are the jealous ones surrounding the soulmates who foolishly think that since there's no soulmate for them, they're going to make sure there isn't one for anybody.

America: I’m with Love Goddess on this. I believe a soulmate is a gift that not many people are lucky enough to experience simply because they're not ready to recognize it or they allow others to make decisions for them without following their heart. 

Love Goddess: That's true America. Essentially a soulmate is the one person who you have a deep connection with and truly cares about you. The person who will do right by you no matter the circumstances; they come into your life to help you. It could be a friend, parent, sibling, or a love interest. Some people have multiple soulmate relationships in their lives, some have one or two, some believe they have none, and as they believe it is done to them. 

Jayden: When it comes to romance, how exactly are you supposed to recognize these goody love givers?

America: You just know. Sometimes they know too, and other times they’ll never know.

Jayden: Oh, that's pretty fucking comforting, sometimes we know and other times we're fucked? So I can pretty much end up with a fucking loonytune who's not gonna love me or care about me and I won't even know it. Shit, I better learn how to recognize my soulmate.

Love Goddess: Well Jayden, the fact is that soulmates are going to come into your life no matter what, whether you are able to recognize them or not is a different story. You are in this life to learn your lessons not to eat, work, and sleep. You’ll either have a great or a marginal experience. Besides, don't worry about ending up with a looneytune, your soulmate will put her in checkmate before looneytune realizes that she might of had you physically, but you were never there mentally or spiritually.     

Jayden: That's good to know, but I’m having a real fucking problem with all of this because I heard that a soulmate comes into your life to piss you off, take out your dirty laundry, and then take off. Why do I need that kinda shit in my life as if I don't already have enough crap to deal with?

Love Goddess: The person you are describing is not a soulmate, but someone you chose to allow into your life against your own knowing. That was your choice and nothing to do a soulmate. You need to take responsibility for that rather than blaming soulmates.

Jayden: Okay, but what about your parents and siblings. It's not like you have a choice there?

Love Goddess: No you don’t, but those are the only relationships you must endure good or bad because they carry the lessons you're here to learn to prepare you for what's ahead of you as painful as they may be. The fact that they are your family is a huge hint to let you know to work through them. Sometimes there are difficult choices to make, but that's the whole point, you need to make them. You also have to understand that you are not the only person in the universe and that those people you happen to find yourself involved with also have lessons to learn. You can learn to look at the positive aspects of everything or you can choose to look at the negative in everything. It’s your choice, therefore you do have choice when it comes to romantic partners and the people you choose to surround yourself with.

Jayden: So can you tell me why would someone who’s your soulmate come into your life and then leave, if this person is supposed to be for me?

Love Goddess: Life is not that simple Jayden, soulmates aren’t martyrs looking for sympathy or to be second best. These are people who mean business, they are looking to truly live life in a sane and big way and if you have not decided that you want that, then you’re not their soulmate. People often mistake their soulmate for someone else. That’s pretty common. But as long as they are doing the right thing, the path will lead them to their soulmate, make no mistake about that, love is blind, but not inhuman.

An elderly man and a frail old lady
Spent a lifetime together, even had a baby
Thinking back on the days when they were young
Went to church on Sunday, In the choir they sung
Had many Blessings but lots of trials too
Praise always to GOD, He said I’ll take care of you
They went through life, watched their children grow
Time had passed so fast, now they were old
There were no regrets for the Lord they had served
For in GOD’S Kingdom their place was reserved
Their bodies were tired, their years had been long
It was time for the Father to call them home
They looked back at the years, they were well pleased
Their life had come full circle, their spirit now released.

copyright 2008 Pamela O Rucker

"Family Dreams and Spiritual Things"

"Joey " The Hybrid" Duarte is one of 32 fighters who will be vying to for 16 spots on this coming season's "The Ultimate Fighter" series on Spike TV. Only 24 years old, Duarte specializes in the Jiu jitsu and Muay Thai of Martial Arts fighting.

The new season will start on Wednesday, September 17th.  Spike TV just announced that  UFC heavyweight champion, Antonio Rodrigo Noqueira and former UFC heavywieght champion Frank Mir will start in the new seaon as coaches.  There will be  light heavyweights (205 lbs) and lightweights (155 lbs).  Duarte will is competing for a slot in the lightwieght division.

Season 8 is being hyped as one with the best talent pool of fighters that The Ultimate Fighter has had in any season. Speaking to all of this,  the following is an exccerpt from an article that ran in the Pacific Daily News on August 29,2008:

"I could never compare myself to Anderson," Duarte said after being asked if he was the fighter in question. "Anderson is at the top of the food chain. ... I don't feel worthy (of that status)," he said.

Silva himself is rumored to make an appearance on the show, but the identity of the fighter White is hyping up will have to wait until the series premiere.

"I can't say it was me or anyone else, but I can say this: no one, no one is an 'Anderson Silva-type fighter.' No one is that good," Duarte said. The former Dededo resident did, however, say that this season has by far the deepest talent pool ever on the show.

"I can't tell you much else because I don't have $4 million to pay UFC (for breaching his contract)," Duarte said with a laugh.

Though talent is a factor, living in California has helped Duarte make his way up the MMA totem pole as he trains with the likes of TUF season one winner Diego Sanchez and WBC and WBO middleweight boxing champion Joey Gilbert.

"With the exposure you get (from being on a national TV show), it moves you up to the front of the line and you get a sense of notoriety that even some champions don't get," Gilbert said via telephone. Gilbert himself is a product of national fame after appearing on NBC's "The Contender."

"I'm really excited for him. Joe is a really smart and great fighter, and even though a lot of doors are open already, this can unlock all the doors for him," Gilbert said.

"It's happening to the right person. I'm lucky to have a friend like Joe. When you find people like him, you have to hang on to them."

 Duarte is a native Chamorro and originally lived in Dededo, Guam and was involved as an athlete at Simon Sanchez High School.  He now lives in California.

The Ultiimate Fighter Web Site: http://www.spike.com/channel/ufc

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I've been reading a lot lately.  Various different topics and sources.  One of the books I'm reading is John Eldredge's "Wild at Heart".  It's so far a good read.  The book is known to give insight into a man's heart and how to rediscover God's passion and sense of adventure in it.  I think there is a fair amount of insight provided in regards to a man's purpose in today's world, his place.  I would recommend it to anyone looking for something fun but touching and involving some thought.  

And on the note of something being touching, I would like to share a portion of the book that effected me greatly.  When I read this my eyes fill with tears.  I think from it we can pull so much truth about us men.  The men of the twentieth century.  The men of twentieth century western society.  You may find this silly, and to be honest I can't fully explain the feeling I have or why these few short paragraphs effected me so.  What I do know is that for the most part I feel that there are fewer and fewer MEN in society.   I think today far to many of us men run from adventure and trouble.  We run from our problems and we run from love.  So many of us don't fulfill our manly purpose we have been assigned by God.  We are leaving our families without fathers, giving up on love and turning our backs on commitments.  We have traded our knives for staplers.  Our passions have been traded for degrees and dreams replaced by six figured salaries.  We all have a sense of adventure and yearning for danger but we try and quash them with investments and political debates.  I see it in my friends and in the people I work with.  I see it on the nightly news and in the Sunday paper.  I see it in my church on Sunday.  It's so clear and such a huge problem in today's America.  Trying to think of some examples I can only come up with a handful of MEN out of the dozens of men I know.  My mom's husband is a MAN.  I think my pastor to be a MAN.  I have a friend Leo who I would classify as a MAN.  My father-in-law is for sure a MAN.  Very few in deed.  By MAN I am meaning someone who owns their lives.  Someone who is caring and loving but strong and courageous.  Someone who isn't afraid of adventure and love.  Someone who will fight for that which he loves!!!

Well, with that here is the portion of the book which I love:

"Our local zoo had for years one of the biggest African lions I've ever seen. A huge male, nearly five hundred pounds, with a wonderful mane and absolutely enormous paws. Panthera leo. The King of the Beasts. Sure, he was caged, but I'm telling you the bars offered small comfort when you stood within six feet of something that in any other situation saw you as an easy lunch. Honestly, I felt I ought to shepherd my boys past him at a safe distance, as if he could pounce on us if he really wanted to. Yet he was my favorite, and whenever the others would wander on to the monkey house or the tigers, I'd double back just for a few more minutes in the presence of someone so powerful and noble and deadly. Perhaps it was fear mingled with admiration, perhaps it was simply that my heart broke for the big old cat.

This wonderful, terrible creature should have been out roaming the savanna, ruling his pride, striking fear into the heart of every wildebeest, bringing down zebras and gazelles whenever the urge seized him. Instead, he spent every hour of every day and every night of every year alone, in a cage smaller than your bedroom, his food served to him through a little metal door. Sometimes late at night, after the city had gone to sleep, I would hear his roar come down from the hills. It sounded not so much fierce, but rather mournful. During all of my visits, he never looked me in the eye. I desperately wanted him to, wanted for his sake the chance to stare me down, would have loved it if he took a swipe at me. But he just lay there, weary with that deep weariness that comes from boredom, taking shallow breaths, rolling now and then from side to side.

For after years of living in a cage, a lion no longer even believes it is a lion . . . and a man no longer believes he is a man."

John Eldredge – Wild at Heart pg. 40-41

Having said all that I just don’t understand ANYTHING being more important than ones children. **********

• To Jenny, her drinking is more important than her kids.

• To Glenn, his being high on prescription meds is more important than his kids.

• To John, money and his hatred of his ex-wife is more important than his kids.

• To my Mother, her bitterness at the cards life dealt her was more important than her kids.

• To my Sister, her next score of illegal drugs was more important than her kids.

Why do people have children if those children and their importance are disposable? I don’t understand how anyone can consider anything as being more important than their kids.

Don’t get me wrong. I am not one of those people who think that my children are little princes who are perfect because of the mere fact that they are mine. Nope. So it’s not an ego thing with me where they are so perfect that I, and everyone, must genuflect at my children’s feet. Nowhere near that. Just like in life, I am nothing if not realistic about my sons and nephew.

It’s just that I cant think of anything, that if I knew it was in any way negatively impacting my children, that I wouldn’t give it up in a heartbeat. 

Is it that the addicted choose not to see the impact on the children? Is it that they convince themselves that it isn’t having an impact? Or does it truly not matter to them as long as the continued addiction is not impeded in any way? I guess I am just musing. Because I don’t have an addictive personality it is a little difficult for me to understand the NEED for anything if it puts ones children in danger or alienates them.

Don’t forget to visit my site called “I Call Myself A Jerk Magnet!”

http://catharsis.scriptmania.com/ 

And yes, the jerk is still obsessed and pretending to be a “white-trash Women” when he posts comments in my comment forum! I find it amusing. I think you will as well!!!

And you can't really be honest about commenting on a relationship - let alone - predicting and analyzing - behaviors, if it does not somehow smell differences and flavors inside. Can you? If you dont get it -perhaps you are a man> Anyway, a lot of women may not get it either: So, here I go:

1. What is a WOMAN ? For those who need to check what a woman is: here is the short of it : A W O MAN = Which Other Man. That's ALL. The long of it can be had here..
2. What is a MAN ? -> A man = Not a Woman. What is a woman -> read [1]. That was the short of it. The long of it is: " I don;'t know.. do you?"
3. What does a MAN mean to a woman ? --> Before you read [1], and go bazooka on me; it would help you tremendously, if you figure out why on earth do men make believe they don't understand. After all, they aren't women. You know: A man = Not a woman.

Maybe, I will get it. Let see try: How about this:and this IS an indictment on ALL men I have met: Sorry, no exceptions:

1. What would you say about this description: " 30 + Single + Status = 'ask me later' + Pls see photos of my car+ last trip to the 1st + 2nd + dirt third world. Oh and please see my essays ( love long walks on the beach+ can swing both ways - indoor or outdoor u name it) with a PS: remind me to send you the the photos from my suba diving trip.
2. IF the above does NOT smell like : Confidence + Champaige + caviar + candy and sugar, cotton over wine.. Then you are dishonest and perhaps: a man. By the way : A question for you : "What is the gender of the above profile". Note: I didnt mention the gender. Did I? Read again. Ok. SO, what is the gender of the above profile? --> Yeah. See. NOW -> Eyes are CLOSED --> and this is when the smells permeate the pores.
3. When you closed your eyes, why is it that you smelled testosterone? -> Why not Ovaries? See -> that's the Secret-Sauce. Do you still not get it?- Chances are - you are a WO-man. And you dont want to know. Because its built inside. W O MAN -> = Which other -Man.. So.. there is this waiting period built inside..
   
4. Now: Another Question: What is the Nationality of this MAN ? --> Keep on guessing and when you stop your mind -> you will smell it from 50 feet apart.
   
5. Another Question: What is the Marital Status of this MAN ? --> Any guesses? - read again
   
6. Another Question: What is the smell of this profile: that starts with : Hi.. and goes on like : " 20 + Single + Have passport can travel + hobby: NOT SCUBA + NOT FOOTBALL + NOT BEER (maybe wine) + essays : looking for : Kind + Charming + intelligent... What does it smell to you? OK.. lets not go grahic here..we all know.. ( sorry. we dont. The pictures are missing)--> lets assume - she is HOT.. as in smoking Hot.

Now, lets do this:

1. Plot Age Difference on the X-axis and Smell of Confidence [oozing out of emails] on the Y - Axis.
2. Plot the "told Hobbies' on the Y - Axis and 'smell of innocence' on the X -axis.
3. Plot "I am Hot" on the X-axis - and the "Smells of Scuba + Rubber +Octane" -> on the Y-axis.

I think, there should be more than 3.. and there are - but lets just say for now - they will make the cut.

Now, what is Regression? - Sorry- I didnt ask HOW to regress -> that's cheap - the how part is cheap -> its the WHAT - that is a bit more expensive.

SO, here you go - the Intteligent - intellectual creed -> What is Regression in a realtionship ? - the short answer - lies in 3 words [a] Speed [b] Variation and [c] Control.

Now, if any of the above does not make sense to you. Never, ever, even try to regress.  Do yourself a favor - pick another hobby - that you like. Don't regress. Not because I say so. Not because you would be wrong. But because you would be worse than wrong -> and here is what is worse than being wrong - click here

I told you, its about Extrapolation + Co - Relation - Did I not?

Hint: If you are looking for a SUMMARY: Let me direct you to the -title - at the TOP.

Bonus: Don't talk about the smells of the dinner - unless you ate it ->been home -> Slept on it and are reday to try it ALONE.

PS: Are you wondering how the regression plot ( its a curve) would look like if you plotted 'SERIOUSNESS INSIDE" ? Are you strong enough to even venture - inside.. Your side?

PS2: Sorry, Just cant resist (will bear the indictment) WHO is a BIGGER Scammer ? The one that smells "Power inside" or the one that fakes "Innocence gratified". Dont forget - what a W -O - MAN is.

PS3: This is dark, Sad. yet real. If you can go through the first 10 pages of

Advise for men, who want me:

read this : IF reading makes you smell the bear--> You cant undersatnd me.. If u cant understand me - Its YOUR responsibility to plot the regression curve - with Seriousness and/or commitment on the Y and " honesty on the X " .. Is is my responsiblity too.. But sorry.. I am a Wo _ MAN -- and if you need to be told what a woman is ; you are just a man..while..I want DA -MAN .. You want to know what DA = ?? --> ALongside my photos - there was this thing - we call - Olga's Profile.

-------------------------------------------------------

Here is KAFKA - defined

------------------------------------------------------

For these reasons, if one still wanted to maintain some sort of relationship by correspondence, one could not provide any real news, the way one would without any inhibitions to the most casual acquaintance. It was already more than three years since his friend had been home, and he explained this with the very inadequate excuse of the uncertainty of the political conditions in Russia, which would not allow even the briefest absence of a small businessman, while it permitted hundreds of thousand of Russians to travel around peacefully in the world. But in the course of these three years much had changed for George. Since his mother’s death, which had taken place about two years earlier, George had lived with his old father in a household they shared. His friend had naturally learned about it and had expressed his sympathy in a letter with such a dry tone that the reason could only have been that the sadness of such an event is completely inconceivable in a foreign country. But since that time George had tackled both his business dealings and everything else with greater determination. Perhaps while his mother was still alive, his father’s unwillingness to accept any point of view in the business except his had prevented George from developing a real project of his own; perhaps his father, since his mother’s death, had grown slacker, although he still worked all the time in the business; perhaps fortunate circumstances had played a much more important role—something which was, in fact, highly likely—but in any case in these two years the business had developed very unexpectedly. They had had to double the staff, the cash turnover had increased fivefold, and there was no doubt that further progress lay ahead.

His friend, however, had no idea of these changes. Earlier, perhaps for the last time in that letter of condolence, he had wanted to persuade George to emigrate to Russia and had expanded upon the prospects which existed in St. Petersburg for George’s particular line of business. The figures were minute compared to the scale which George’s business had now acquired. But George had had no desire to write to his friend about his commercial success, and if he were to do it now belatedly, it would have looked really odd.

So George limited himself to writing to his friend only about insignificant details, the kind which pile up at random in one’s memory when one is thinking things over on a peaceful Sunday. The only thing he wanted was to leave undisturbed the picture which his friend must have created of his home town during the long interval and which he would have learned to live with. And so it happened that George had announced three times to his friend in fairly widely spaced letters the engagement of an unimportant man to an equally unimportant young woman, until, quite contrary to George’s intentions, the friend really began to get interested in this curious event......

Now, to find me - READ KAFKA - and then attempt to Regress my Mind.. and Dont forget -> Its Olga Inside.

Sad  and Hurt,

Olga Lednichenko

" man hier".

Its the manual page describing the file system hierarchy. I feel that in order to work conviniently GNU/Linux, the knowledge of which folder in the filesystem is

Still the same old Mack... Never changed, saved that it'd probably be a long time since we'd meet again. I have this... perculiar habit of sniffing at 'friends'. Always thrilling.

No matter, Mack's world is not the same as mine. He's very contented climbing the ladders in Singapore, much to my inability to appreciate that; While I am very contented in moving out further, and eventually... there won't be a Scope in Singapore. But I sure hope that he can be the friend I expect of a friend. But this is the cultural desert...

I am seemingly asking too much from my peers in Singapore.

It's the same with Chok Soon and Cindy. ICA has granted Cindy citizenship, and my congrats to her.

It's always thrilling to observe my peers who are typical Singaporeans. Chok Soon has links to Malaysians and certain dignitaries with shrewd Cindy around, while Mack virtually rolls in the society and becomes street smart, and all are climbing the ladders as their personal goals.

Typing... I thought of Siping. Her boyfriend probably led her astray alongside with her naughty self in school, and I felt so glad when she met me a few years back telling me that she was in poly instead of working, saying she was back on the right path. She knew I was concerned about her, nagging at her when we were at school; and I met her a few years later since, she was already a manageress. But we weren't that close anymore. But I was still very happy for her.

These are friends in Singapore. Lost and found, but never really yours. Which is in accordance to this: 君子之交淡如水. It means friendship is relationship which is plain and easy as water. In Chinese, real friends consist of people of great virtues in relationship, and such are hardly found in Singapore... the cultural desert. Such friends are called 伯乐 in Chinese, which means very good pals who can form lasting relationship based on virtues; and one is very lucky to get one in a lifetime.

Mack asked a pretty stupid question: What did you do in China?

Surprised if he expected me to answer him. What I can reveal was already blogged. The rest is strictly confidential, maximum security, and even my trips were heavily guarded.

August is about to end, and I should be in Beijing by now has it not being for the Olympics, and my parents have some health problems. The fortune teller had suggested that because I have this 龙气 (???), it is best that every year I visit the praying grounds of the emperors for once. But I am so tied up in Singapore playing filial that I couldn't even make it for the family gathering in China a few months back, not to say to celebrate Hilliary's birthday and to meet up with a few contacts.

I looked at Cat, I know she has been flipping through my things, through my notes and so on. I never made an alarm on her, I just observed her... quietly. The Singaporean fortune teller warned me about trusting a woman, I may not know if she refered to who... so many women, but that silly Singaporean didn't seem to realise that I don't trust anyone, not to say women or a woman. I love them all, but that doesn't mean I can find them reliable.

By now, I know the so called fated school mate in my life so refered to by the fortune teller must have been Kate. Not to say Chok Soon said she's married, even if she is not... hardly possible as well. I need someone mature, and got the calibre to hang around with me, and someone intelligent enough to talk to. Much for my decades of crush on her, I know very well she's not that steady type. I'd have to spend more time and energy to protect her than she's going to make my life easier out there.

After being filial, I expect more time outside Singapore. After all, Project S must go on somehow; And all the fundings are parking outside Singapore for alot of things to be done.

Some people complained that I have disappeared from MSN. Sorry, folks. But ever since I formatted the disks, I have found other leisure than MSN. I have grown rather tired with MSN, and with women. The only thing that interests me is romance, or the pleasure of love.

Yesterday, I met Gopal's sisters, again. I met them only recently on the MRT train, and again at Seiyu. Such a small world is Singapore. One of the twin is looking for a job in Singapore. All the best to her! Nice girl, she should try her luck outside Singapore. It is a huge world out there. But yeah, it's pretty havoc out there as well.

COMEX: The Broken Recorder.

When I read on the 27th that COMEX (Singapore's computer or IT show) was coming on the 28th, I decided to load the goods before I drove to Bugis to park for COMEX. Now the frustrating part was the ERP which clocked Xpm to Ypm at a certain toll rate, and when I thought ERP was dead for the day at Ypm+1second, the fucking toll rate increased and the clock reported it was ERP rate from Ypm to Zpm...

Hey~ I thought even machines needed to rest!

Never mind, I never drove through the ERP. Maybe I should have driven into the gantry instead, then Singaporeans may hail Scope as the hero. I don't understand why traffic was so light and ERP was on as well. Maybe if I did so, the native minister may thank me for helping to demolish the gantry for free, and raise a Scope statue there in order to commemorate the great service of Scope rendered to Singapore in place of the ERP. It could end up a cool tourist sight.

Sounds like a joke, but imagine if the minister were to order a pizza or Kenduckie Fried Chickees (or whatever) and the sotong driver passed two ERPs and the one at Bugis hits a toll rate of S$6... Die lah! So fucking expensive! Heart pain, right?

"What?! Two fried chickee wings cost $6+$6+$1?! You crazy, is it?!"

This joke helps to save the sanity of Singapore in a way.

[Alamak! Anything Special?] COMEX 2008, I have been waiting for it for two months already. Why? Scope is a cheapskate, that's why. Mr brother knows his only brother very well, that he always go for the lowest price possible for the same thing; very good at sourcing. Instead of spending $100,000+for a machine, he's getting the machine for $1,000.

Now COMEX is no longer appealing to old birds such as Scope. Latest products are not appealing because you know you can get them cheaper and earlier possibly in China; the peripherals are way more expensive than China's rates, but the memory cards are priced ok in Singapore as compared to China... But then, when you know where to get super cheap memory cards in Singapore, COMEX becomes useless in a way.

The only reason why I had been waiting for COMEX was for the printer ink cartridges. You got them cheaper at COMEX and you got them with free gifts. I could buy two packages at COMEX with the same money for only one package usually.

Other than that, nothing else really to buy in general.

Some booths did catch my attention at this COMEX. The M1 booth was offering a cool 500MMS for free plan for the same money I was paying to M1 then. Imagine Edison could be sending his dick's pictures around via MMS for free to 500 pretties a month, and what's more... he can choose 3 M1 users to spread his love around via phone calls for free as well! And Edison can have IDD calls to 19 countries around the world with the cheapskate plan, so wherever he runs road to, he could still piss off 19 countries...

Good plan. I immediately signed up for a fucking change. And it was not even a renewal of contract!

Then there were other booths, the Lim N Tan Online Trading and the OCBC Online Trading. Interesting, because I have been thinking of online trading for about... a decade. However, it's the same fucking issue... What if the account is hacked into, and no one will be responsible for dick deals, and you'd be gone case? Every salesman will tell you nothing has happened so far, but I have little trust for local finance people, much less so for salespeople from finance sector... But very tempting lor, because the cheaper the cost (commission), the lesser the risk and the more you can make from trading with more techniques.

One booth made me laughed quietly: The Hardwarezone. It was very funny that they were selling publication when they have the website cum forum for all the real-time gossips and updates free to probably the same people who are interested with IT, and thus the publication.

Another booth interested me as well. The fake ink booth, and I forgot the name not on purpose. The interest came from the offer of cheaper ink and acessories at COMEX; I could use the offer for large scale publishing soon...

The last booth worth the mention here was one selling the solar-charger. Point is, if I were to get a Sony SR12e, I can't rely on its freaky battery to last long enough for the shooting. A solar charger will come in handy. But I have seen this 'latest invention' in China a year back... So nothing new lah~

The Sony SR12E was actually sold for S$2899?! I am getting it at S$2000 in Malaysia... and probably lower next year.

Actually, there was another booth that interested me, but... I doubt I'd buy the S$120 software that can produce music using a computer instead of a keyboard. But I'd keep an eye on that, nonetheless. Point is, Movie Edit Pro Plus 14 has something like that... if I am not wrong. So why in the fuck should I waste S$120 at COMEX? In the event Movie Edit is without, the music processing can still be done in China with Chinese software via email. Not a problem. The only problem is with the blue screen and HD rendering... As the initial plan is, it's possible only by next year when basically the 2.88ghz quad core 4mb ram with 88' 512mb card dips to a fair price. Now S$8.90 is getting you a 2gbtye flash memory. Memory is no longer an issue, but the acting crew is.

If not for the reality of the market, I'd have ditched the humans for 3D characters. I am a professional, not the Singaporean type lah~

Cosmo Nature: Frontier Super Fold.

The Japanese has a pretty weird way of defining English. What the hack is 'Cosmo Nature'? I picked this up in Macross Frontier, but here it literally means... something.

Basically, a mother and daughter came and raised the concern about Project S. But the issue of competition has never been an issue, and yes... Project S is meant to wait. The whole idea of Project S or Singaporeans is that most see this as a business idea.

Well, if this is a business idea, it's never a new one, isn't it? China is shooting drama series. Mediacorpse is shooting drama series. The whole world is shooting drama series. So what's so special about Project S? So what's the hurry?

In cultural sector, there is really no such thing as competition when it comes to movies. Reason is pretty straight forward, and can be easily explained that just because you watched Macross Frontier doesn't mean you won't buy Final Fantasy VII. Just because you watched Hellboy II doesn't mean you won't go for Batman IV dvd. So what's the point about hurrying, especially when I am supposed to be in charge?

There is only competition when you produce rubbish, and you hope the money will come earlier before the next rubbish arrives. Which is why Gung Fu can wait, Stephen Chow can wait... because Project S is hoping to enhance quality, not to rip short term profits. So what you rack in millions of dollars now? Once the market matures, it is still the quality and sincerity behind a respectable effort in cultural sector. This mess is not going to stop as long as the puny pie remains... rotten or not, doesn't matter.

What matters is it should be a large cake, not a tiny rotten pie infested with worms. That's the big picture. And which is why I won't be bothered with this: I know I am not qualified... I tried the industry before in Malaysia, won't work.

I met a guy, he said that. He was active in Malaysia in the circles for a moment, and he thought it was impossible. But it is precisely because we want to stay away from the main rot, that we intend to start Project S. So that's the psychology I have to deal with. Nobody really looks directly at what is there. Everybody is having their own ideas when there is only one idea... It seems to be a common problem in Southeast Asia.

Makes me pretty reluctant to work with the people here...

The acting crew is an issue... The mentality and attitude of southerners are pretty... scary. They don't have a dream, the passion, the vigor you see in those Chinese up North like myself. They probably see Project S as another ATM to money and rewards, a business where competition matters.

Why in the fuck do I need them? And someone is asking this silly question: Are you from Mediacorpse?

You can't blame these people since their world is only that big and their mindsets are so simple. I might as well go Geylang pay those pretty faces the fucking rates and shoot 'Sperms'... A movie named 'Sperms', ok? I can't believe it~ It won't work in Singapore, these people ain't global!

Even talking to them requires a huge effort. I have no problem understanding why Singapore can't click with China.

OMG~

I'd be a very happy man if fellow Singaporeans can actually make sense for one day. Can this be done?

Low morale is one thing, but I can sense young girls do have an interest in being shot. Like one auntie said, young naughty girls who love to have fun will love it; but I sincerely want young but not so young girls who have passion. Because once you got on screen, once you got public, you can expect criticisms and alot more, and you can't expect to behave as some governments going around suing people, or expect to be Dawn Yang II. And you are expected to be global...

It's not that fun if you can't handle publicity; then what's the point of being a star? What's the point of Project S? I might as well open a law firm instead!

Between a 戏子 and a 演员, a choice must be made. Acting should be a respectable social activity, actors should be respectable individuals, and not mere commercial commodities like the entertainment industry at Geylang. The passion in this honorable sector of culture makes the difference. I mean, who the fuck is passionate in being a hooker, passionate in fucking for cash?

Yeah right, pervert.

A cake should not be a rotten pie. A beautiful cultural industry should groom talents, not hookers. It should have beautiful scenes, wonderful idols, and move the society in the right direction... not the society moves the industry into commercial rots with idols sucking cocks and playing petty politics just to get a role. I sometimes find that prostitutes may have more pride and honesty hence worth more respect than many in the circles...

Hopefully, the local interest will fuel a possibility of something more beautiful than what low morale promises.

So, do you know what Cosmo Nature means?

My mood has been up n down since last night.  I spoke to MM on the phone before he started work and he was asking if I was ok, I said yes, I just wished I could see him more.  He said "I know, it's a shame I couldn't get a job in Glasgow or I could of met you for lunch all the time" I said yeah... but then I was thinking, I hope that's not all he thinks I want, or what he wants, to see him at lunchtime, I want to be going out with him, staying over at his house or mine etc etc.  So later I txt him saying something along those lines, and I woke up to a voicemail saying that he wasn't very happy I sent that text and that I need to stop thinking too much.  And he's right so I'm really trying my best not to.  He had also txtd saying that we were definately going to London :) So now I suppose I'm not going to Manchester.  I really want to go with MM it's just that I think I should see my friends more... and have more fun with them.  But not this time coz I love being with him and I love London.... Hmmm... have to stop thinking about that too much!  We went to London this month but it was kinda ruined as I got a bad headache.  Right, def going to London and I'm going to love it!!!

I think I've got to start thinking of my relationship as an added extra to my life and not a part of it.  Don't know if that sounds right but I mean I need to stop kinda expecting to see him so much and just take things as they come and if I see him I see him, and not rely on him so much for my happiness.  I need to learn to be happy without a man.  That sounds so strange because I have a man!!!!  But I can't let that be the only reason I'm happy.  If anyone does read this I hope you know what I mean ha ha.

Wavy hair again today :) also dying of cramp :( I'm back on the pill so it's not as bad as usual but still pretty hellish.

Going out with LC etc tonight.  Someone in their work is having a night out n they're all asking friends to go too.  Don't think I'll mention Roisin tonight I'll leave it for another time.

I'm wearing black bra, black & pink lacy knickers, grey pinstrip trousers, little navy top, hot pink cardi and my blue Lacostes!  And my hair is down n wavy.  Wearing usual make up (Benefit Boi-ing, Oh La Lift, High Beam & Posie Tint, and 2 Faced Lash Injection mascara) plus a dark blue Urban Decay eyeshadow called Adore (I think).

xoxo

29 August 2008

WHAT began as a private act reached a very public conclusion in a Malaysian hospital on Monday.

A man in his twenties decided to slip a ring around his penis , reported Guang Ming Daily.

To his horror, he discovered he could not take the ring off.

He ended up making a trip to the emergency room at the University Malaya Medical Centre.

Doctor stumped

The doctor was also stumped by this unusual problem - the ring was too tight for him to remove with his surgical tools.

To make things worse, the patient was in terrible pain and had to be anaesthesised.

Shortly after, a team of six firefighters arrived at the hospital to deal with the 'emergency'.

By this time, a group of doctors had gathered around the patient, but none of them could figure out how to get the ring off.

One of the firefighters came forward and used a large pair of cutters - normally used at the scene of a fire or car crash - and delicately snipped the ring off.

It was over in less than a minute.

Webshop med parfym kan ju kännas lite underligt att beställa ifrån men om man vet vilken doft man önskar så är detta ett riktigt smidigt sätt att beställa ifrån och samtidigt slippa alla köer och människor som trängs och otrevlig personal som ine vet vad service är.

Session 5

(Length 40:05)

Does God want women to teach the Bible? Are women allowed to operate in positions of authority in the body of Christ? Is it permissible for women to prophesy, teach, and preach God's word to men and women in the body? Or is it God's will for her to be silent?

Join Monica Dennington as she goes straight to the Final Word - the Holy Bible - for God's definitive answer to the question: Should women teach?

Art of the Day: Asian Hydrangea Bloom by Edo Painters

I don't typically enjoy Asian art. That's not completely true. Obviously by my posting this picture. But my mother loves it. I think her house would be a perfect replica of a traditional Chinese home if she could. I like Asian colors and designs that that use in their fabrics. Their paintings are much more muted in alot of cases and I guess that may have something to do with why I'm not as much of a fan of the art work.

Sorry about no post yesterday. I found myself sitting at the laptop at 10:30pm and I still hadn't even started a post for the day. And I was exhausted. It's official that I can't write both a blog and a chapter of my story in one day. Because yesterday I wrote one or two chapters and was completely blogged out. I had no words left.

I found an interesting article online today. And when I say interesting, I mean weird. The world is discussing ownership rights of the moon. You heard me, the moon. Apparently several countries are planning to go back to the moon and set up little moon camps. This is all fascinating, really, but doesn't it cost millions and millions ...and millions of dollars to go to the moon? And let me just check this... but isn't the moon basically just a big rock? Yeah, I thought so. Oh, don't get me wrong. It's a beautiful rock. And going would be very cool. But I don't think it ranks above using those millions and millions and ...millions of dollars to help this planet. Ya know, the one with people on it. If we can't even feed our own people and NOT destroy our own ecosystems, do you really think going to the moon is a good idea? We're more likely to screw it up and Earth in the process than do any good. And the very fact that they aren't even there yet and are discussing 'property rights' doesn't bode well. Forget Star Wars, I see Moon Wars in our future.

I brought up the fact that my sister had a miscarriage the other day in my blog. What I didn't mention was what I was doing when I found out. I was in the process of writing a chapter for my story about a threatened abortion which is just another term for an almost miscarriage. It was bizarre on so many levels. But one thing that is true about me, I don't like to talk about these types of things. The ones that cut too close to home and hurt. So I'm done with this subject for now.

I had an old man repeatedly check out my chest in conversation today. Usually I am pretty oblivious to these type of things. That or they just don't happen. I'm going to go with oblivious. But I had a cliche moment with this man because for maybe the second time in my life I actually felt the desire to say, "I'm up here." It's not like I have a great rack either. Small chested female present and accounted for. Guess it wasn't too much of a problem with this guy. And he was old so the first time he did it I almost looked down thinking I had spilled something on my shirt or somehow I was exposing myself and hadn't become aware of it.

My Aunt Josie is coming in tomorrow. She'll be coming by my apartment at some point so I have to have it sparkling clean. It is WAY far from that now so even though for once I am dog tired at ten and ready to go to bed I'm going to be up all night cleaning. Figures. Damn procrastination.

No video today. Been too busy.

By David Zinczenko From his book, "Men, Love & Sex: The Complete User's

Guide for Women" Updated: Jul 11, 2007

David Zinczenko

Here's a great irony: Men, in general, are happy in their relationships.

And yet women -- the very people responsible for making guys so happy --

spend a great deal of time fretting over whether their men want to stay in

the relationship or are waiting to catch the next bus out of it. Indeed,

women spend so much time fretting that they often ask men to talk more

about ... gasp! ... their feelings. And the one thing that can make a

contented guy discontented is being asked to talk about his feelings. It's

like cooking up a great souffle, and then opening the oven to check on it

-- and presto, the souffle goes flat.

It's not that you should never ask a man about his feelings. But it's all

about technique: you need to coax him to that place where he can share;

pushing him just makes him stubborn.

Don't use the f-word

The problem for a lot of guys is that talking feelings with a woman is

like talking French with a native Parisian. No matter how hard we study,

we'll never master the language with quite the same fluency. So you need

to make things a little simpler for us.

From our end, we'd prefer that you don't directly ask about the "f-word"

-- feelings.

“Say the word feelings to a man and it's like clipping your toenails

during a striptease”

Say the word feelings to a man and it's like clipping your toenails during

a striptease -- total turn-off. The reason? We have feelings, but we don't

have the access to them that you do. So every conversation that's

pointedly about our feelings seems to us like the last 15 minutes of "Law

& Order," where we're the perp and you're the clever detective, poking a

finger in our face and hinting that you know just a little more than we

do. And you do know a little more than we do. You know how you feel. And

we don't know how we feel. So if you want us to talk, then help us speak

your language -- by speaking a little of ours.

The point: If you want us to answer questions about what we're feeling,

then stop asking about how we're feeling. Instead, watch how we behave,

and where our interests lie. And be open about your feelings. The more you

show comfort in expressing yourself, the more he'll do the same.

How do I know where the relationship is going?

I feel like I've hit a snag in a relationship with my boyfriend. We've

been seeing each other for a few months. Everything was really great in

the beginning. Now, it seems like we've fallen into that typical

relationship routine. We see each other during the week, rent a movie on

Fridays, and usually have sex twice a week (once after the movie). He's

nice to me and treats me well, but I'd like to get things back to where

they were. He tells me everything's fine, assures me he cares about me,

and tells me not to worry about it. But I still do because what he says is

one thing but what happens week to week is another. Any idea what he's

thinking?

Yeah. He's thinking exactly what he's saying, which is that everything's

fine. "

“Women think that not talking about the relationship means there are

problems, but it's the opposite for men”

Women think that not talking about the relationship means there are

problems, but it's the opposite for men. If we're not talking about it, it

means we're happy," says Conner, 32. So the real question is not "What's

he thinking?" It's "What are you thinking?" If you're content with the

relationship you've got, then relax and enjoy it. And if you want more,

say so. "If a man loves a woman, he'll prove it with daily action not just

words," says Jimmy, 27. Either he'll step up to the plate, or what he's

giving now is all he's got -- and maybe you need to move on.

Why don't guys answer emotional questions?

I've got a good friend who recently left her husband. They have one child

who's eight, and my friend and her ex are now in this bitter disagreement

about custody, about money, about who gets to see the daughter when. When

I told my husband about it, I asked him how he felt about it, because

these are really serious issues, and I figured he'd have really serious

thoughts on them. Instead, he just sat there, shrugged his shoulders, and

said, "That sucks." Does the man have no feelings?

Of course he has feelings, and he told you what they were: He feels the

situation sucks. Oh, but wait ... you were looking for something more.

Here's the problem: You wanted him to tune into your concerns, but the

signal you were sending was fuzzier than a pirate radio station. It's the

old "feelings" conundrum again. If you want to ask him how he'd handle a

custody issue, then ask him how he'd handle a custody issue. If you want

to know if he thinks it's wrong for one partner to give up on a marriage,

then ask him about that. But don't ask him about his feelings and expect

him to surmise that your telling him a story about the neighbors is some

Aesop's fable for your relationship. "We're simple. Please, no hints or

assumptions," says D.J., 26. "Say what you mean, mean what you say. Don't

make us guess as if we know what you are trying to say or feel."

D.J.'s a bit of a wishful thinker. Just as men like direct, problem

A/solution B equations, women seem to take a more poetic and metaphorical

approach to communication. That's why communication between the sexes is

so much work. To men, dealing with hypotheticals is fun when we're talking

about pennant races and the stock market, not when you're asking us to

project how we'd feel about anything really serious, like a breakup or

infidelity or pizza toppings. In that case, direct questions will get you

the answers you want: let's stay together, I'll be faithful forever, and

no anchovies, please.

Why can't a guy just plan out our future?

My husband and I have two kids, a boy and a girl, ages three and six. I'm

tired of taking the pill, so I've tried talking to my husband about other

options. Specifically, I asked him if he wanted more kids. (I could go

either way.) And if he didn't, then we should talk about a vasectomy. But

he can't decide whether he wants more children, and he doesn't seem too

thrilled with the idea of getting the vasectomy. Why doesn't he just tell

me what he wants so then we can come up with some kind of game plan?

Your question contains this interesting phrase: "I could go either way."

It sounds like you and your husband are both comfortable in a pair of

flip-flops. In our polls and surveys, we've asked men about the vasectomy

issue. John, 41, has been talking about a vasectomy with his wife, but

they're having trouble getting at the root of who really wants to do what.

"Neither of us will come right out and say we're done having kids. She

thinks me not signing right up for the operation somehow means that I have

this evil master plan: that if I dump her, I'll be able to have kids with

some 22-year-old bimbo. But I just don't want to get one, because neither

of us have closed the door on having kids, and if she's up for it, I'm up

for it."

The fact is that men hate admitting that they don't have a plan, and with

complex issues like this, it's hard for a guy to decide, unilaterally, the

rest of both your lives. He's going to flip and flop like a beached sea

bass until he knows for certain. And then, one day, he's just going to

announce his decision.I know, it's hard living with us. Just don't try

living without us.

Masculinity mastered: what you now know about men

* "Feelings" is our f-word. Bleep it out of your conversational

repertoire. Try pointed questions like "What do you think about...."

* We feel everything's okay when we're not talking about feelings.

When we're talking about feelings, we feel everything's on the rocks.

* Backed into a corner, we won't let you into our heads. Give us some

space and we'll let you in.

Say this tonight!

* The sexiest thing a woman ever said to Dale, 32: "What would you

like for breakfast?"

* The sexiest thing Tricia, 28, ever said to a man: "I wish I could

have you."

Say this, not that!

* Say this: "What do you think about that?"

* Not: "How do you feel about that?"

* Because: He knows how to answer the first question, but the second

one makes him nervous.

* Say this: "I wish I could say this in a way that makes more sense to

you."

* Not: "You don't understand me."

* Because: Miscommunication is a two-way street.

* Say this: "Let's go for a drive."

* Not: "Let's sit down and talk."

* Because: Men are less tense when they're doing something physical.

* Say anything: Once

* Not: Ten times

* Because: To a guy, repetition makes a statement meaningless.

What it means when....

* He says, "I love you" for the first time (not during sex).

* He does. And he thought it long before he ever said it.

* He says, "Fine," in response to a question about how his day was.

* Fine. If something significant happened, he'll tell you -- in a few

hours.

* He says, "Five," when you ask him how many women he's slept with.

* Twelve.

Wondering woman

Why is it so hard for guys to write a personal message in a birthday card?

Every year all I get is "Love, Jim."Â Five minutes on the way back from

the drugstore doesn't give a whole lot of time to come up with something

clever. Plus, he'd rather let a nice dinner and a show do the talking for

him.

Male mysteries

* 27: Percentage of men who say they primarily fight with their wives

or girlfriends about the fact that they don't share or talk about

their feelings.

* 65: Percentage of men who don't want their partners to ask more

questions about them.

Excerpted by permission from "Men, Love & Sex, The Complete User's Guide

for Women" by David Zinczenko with Ted Spiker; Rodale, 2006

LAKELAND, Fla. — Todd Bentley has a long night ahead of him, resurrecting the dead, healing the blind, and exploding cancerous tumors. Since April 3, the 32-year-old, heavily tattooed, body-pierced, shaved-head Canadian preacher has been leading a continuous "supernatural healing revival" in central Florida. To contain the 10,000-plus crowds flocking from around the globe, Bentley has rented baseball stadiums, arenas and airport hangars at a cost of up to $15,000 a day. Many in attendance are church pastors themselves who believe Bentley to be a prophet and don't bat an eye when he tells them he's seen King David and spoken with the Apostle Paul in heaven. "He was looking very Jewish," Bentley notes.

Tattooed across his sternum are military dog tags that read "Joel's Army." They're evidence of Bentley's generalship in a rapidly growing apocalyptic movement that's gone largely unnoticed by watchdogs of the theocratic right. According to Bentley and a handful of other "hyper-charismatic" preachers advancing the same agenda, Joel's Army is prophesied to become an Armageddon-ready military force of young people with a divine mandate to physically impose Christian "dominion" on non-believers.

"An end-time army has one common purpose — to aggressively take ground for the kingdom of God under the authority of Jesus Christ, the Dread Champion," Bentley declares on the website for his ministry school in British Columbia, Canada. "The trumpet is sounding, calling on-fire, revolutionary believers to enlist in Joel's Army. … Many are now ready to be mobilized to establish and advance God's kingdom on earth."

Joel's Army followers, many of them teenagers and young adults who believe they're members of the final generation to come of age before the end of the world, are breaking away in droves from mainline Pentecostal churches. Numbering in the tens of thousands, they base their beliefs on an esoteric reading of the second chapter of the Old Testament Book of Joel, in which an avenging swarm of locusts attacks Israel. In their view, the locusts are a metaphor for Joel's Army.

Despite their overt militancy, there's no evidence Joel's Army followers have committed any acts of violence. But critics warn that actual bloodletting may only be a matter of time for a movement that casts itself as God's avenging army.

Those sounding the alarm about Joel's Army are not secular foes of the Christian Right, few of whom are even aware of the movement or how widespread it's become in the past decade. Instead, Joel's Army critics are mostly conservative Christians, either neo-Pentecostals who left the movement in disgust or evangelical Christians who fear that Joel's Army preachers are stealing their flocks, even sending spies to infiltrate their own congregations and sway their young people to heresy. And they say the movement is becoming frightening.

"The pitch and intensity of the military rhetoric of this branch of the global Dominionist movement has substantially increased since the beginning of 2008," writes The Discernment Research Group, a Christian watchdog group that tracks what they call heresies or cults within Christianity. "One can only wonder how long before this transforms into real warfare with actual warriors."

'Snorting Religion'
Joel's Army believers are hard-core Christian dominionists, meaning they believe that America, along with the rest of the world, should be governed by conservative Christians and a conservative Christian interpretation of biblical law. There is no room in their doctrine for democracy or pluralism. Dominionism's original branch is Christian Reconstructionism, a grim, Calvinist call to theocracy that, as Reconstructionist writer Gary North describes, wants to "get busy in constructing a Bible-based social, political and religious order which finally denies the religious liberty of the enemies of God."

Notorious for endorsing the public execution by stoning of homosexuals and adulterers, the Christian Reconstructionist movement is far better known in secular America than Joel's Army. That's largely because Reconstructionists have made several serious forays into mainstream politics and received a fair amount of negative publicity as a result. Joel's Army followers eschew the political system, believing the path to world domination lies in taking over churches, not election to public office.

Another key difference between the two branches of dominionism, which maintain a testy, arms-length relationship with one another, is Christian Reconstructionism's buttoned-down image and heavy emphasis on Bible study, which contrasts sharply with Joel's Army anti-intellectual distrust of biblical scholars and its unruly style.

"Some people snort cocaine, others snort religions," Joel's Army Pastor Roy said while ministering a morning program at Todd Bentley's Lakeland, Fla., revival in late May.

As this article went to press, Bentley's "Florida Outpouring" had been running for more than 100 days straight. Many attendees came in search of spontaneous physical healing and a desire to be part of a mystical community marked by dancing, shouting, gyrating, speaking in tongues and other forms of ecstatic release.

Snide jabs at traditional church services are fairly common at Bentley's revivals. In fact, what takes place onstage at the Florida Outpouring looks more like a pro wrestling extravaganza than church. On stage, Bentley and his team of pastors, yell, chant, and scream "Fire!" and "Bam!" while anointing followers.

"The Call," a 12-hour revival of up to 20,000 young people held in a different city each year, is led by Joel's Army pastor Lou Engle.

The audience members behave as if they are at a psychedelic counterculture festival. One couple jumps up and down twirling red and silver metallic flags. Dyed-haired teenagers pulled in by the revival's presence on Facebook and MySpace wander around looking dazed. Women lay facedown on the floor, convulsing and howling. Fathers wail in tongues as their confused children look on. Strangers lay hands on those who fail to produce tongues or gyrate wildly enough, pressuring them to "let it out."

Bentley is considered a prophet both by his followers and by other leaders of the Joel's Army movement, whose adherents claim to be reviving a "five-fold ministry" of prophets, apostles, elders, pastors and teachers, as outlined in the Book of Ephesians. Not every five-fold ministry is connected to the Joel's Army movement, but the movement has spurred an interest in modern-day apostles and prophets that's troubling to the Assemblies of God, the world's largest Pentecostal church, which has officially disavowed the Joel's Army movement.

In a 2001 position paper, Assemblies of God leaders wrote that they do not recognize modern-day apostles or prophets and worried that "such leaders prefer more authoritarian structures where their own word or decrees are unchallenged." They are right to worry. Joel's Army followers believe that once democratic institutions are overthrown, their hierarchy of apostles and prophets will rule over the earth, with one church per city.

Warrior Nation
According to Joel's Army doctrine, the enforcers of the five-fold ministry will be members of the final generation, for whom the landmark Supreme Court decision Roe v. Wade constituted a new Passover."Everyone born after abortion's legalization can consider their birth a personal invitation to take part in this great army," writes John Crowder, another prominent Joel's Army pastor, who bills his 2006 book, The New Mystics: How to Become Part of the Supernatural Generation, as a literal how-to guide for joining Joel's Army.

Both Bentley and Crowder are enormously popular on Elijah's List, an online watering hole for a broad spectrum of Joel's Army enlistees, from lightweight believers who merely share an affection for military rhetoric and pastors who dress in army camouflage (several Joel's Army pastors are addressed by their congregants as "commandant" or "commander") to hardliners who believe the church is called to have an active military role in end-times that have already begun. Elijah's List currently has more than 125,000 subscribers on its electronic mailing list.

Rick Joyner, a pastor whose books, The Harvest and The Call, helped popularize Joel's Army theology by selling more than a million copies each, goes the furthest on Elijah's List in pushing the hardliner approach. In 2006, he posted a sermon called "The Warrior Nation — The New Sound of the Church," in which he claimed that a last-day army is now gathering and called believers "freedom fighters."

"As the church begins to take on this resolve, they [Joel's Army churches] will start to be thought of more as military bases, and they will begin to take on the characteristics of military bases for training, equipping, and deploying effective spiritual forces," Joyner wrote. "In time, the church will actually be organized more as a military force with an army, navy, air force, etc."

In a sort of disclaimer, Joyner writes at one point that God's army "will bring love, peace and stability wherever they go." But several of his books narrate with glee what he describes as "a coming civil war within the church." In his 1997 book The Harvest he writes: "Some pastors and leaders who continue to resist this tide of unity will be removed from their place. Some will become so hardened they will become opposers and resist God to the end."

Two years later, in his book The Final Quest, Joyner described a vision (taken as prophecy in the Joel's Army world, where Joyner is considered an "apostle") of the coming Christian Civil War in which demon-possessed Christian soldiers enslave other, weaker Christians who resist them. He also describes how the hero of the novel — himself — ascends a "Holy Mountain" in order to learn new truths and to acquire new, magic weapons.

Kids on Fire
Bentley, who claims to be a supernatural healer, is no less over the top, playing his biker-punk appearance and heavy metal theatrics to the hilt. On YouTube, where clips of his most dramatic healings have been condensed into a three-minute highlight reel, Bentley describes God ordering him to kick an elderly lady in the face: "I am thinking, 'God, why is the power of God not moving?' And He said, 'It is because you haven't kicked that women in the face.' And there was, like, this older lady worshipping right in front of the platform and the Holy Spirit spoke to me and the gift of faith came on me. He said, 'Kick her in the face … with your biker boot.' I inched closer and I went like this [makes kicking motion]: Bam! And just as my boot made contact with her nose, she fell under the power of God."The atmosphere is less charged with violence at "The Call," a 12-hour revival of up to 20,000 youths led by Joel's Army pastor Lou Engle and held every summer in a major American city (this year's event was scheduled for Washington, D.C. in August).

Attendees are called upon to fast and pray for 40 days and take up culture-war pledges to lead abstinent lives, reject pornography and fight abortion. They're further asked to perform "identificational repentance," lugging along family trees and genealogies to see where one of their ancestors may have enslaved or oppressed another so that they can make amends. (Many in the Joel's Army movement believe in generational curses that must be broken by the current generation).

As even his critics note, Engle is a sweet, humble and gentle man whose persona is difficult to reconcile with his belief in an end-time army of invincible young Christian warriors. Yet while Engle is careful to avoid deploying explicit Joel's Army rhetoric at high-profile events like The Call, when he's speaking in smaller hyper-charismatic circles to avowed Joel's Army followers, he can venture into bloodlust.

This March, at a "Passion for Jesus" conference in Kansas City sponsored by the International House of Prayer, or IHOP, a ministry for teenagers from the heavy metal, punk and goth scenes, Engle called on his audience for vengeance.

"I believe we're headed to an Elijah/Jezebel showdown on the Earth, not just in America but all over the globe, and the main warriors will be the prophets of Baal versus the prophets of God, and there will be no middle ground," said Engle. He was referring to the Baal of the Old Testament, a pagan idol whose followers were slaughtered under orders from the prophet Elijah.

"There's an Elijah generation that's going to be the forerunners for the coming of Jesus, a generation marked not by their niceness but by the intensity of their passion," Engle continued. "The kingdom of heaven suffers violence and the violent take it by force. Such force demands an equal response, and Jesus is going to make war on everything that hinders love, with his eyes blazing fire."

Although Joel's Army theology is mainly directed at people in their teens and early 20s via events like The Call and ministries like IHOP, sometimes the target audience is even younger. In some of the most arresting images in "Jesus Camp," a 2006 documentary about the Kids on Fire bible camp in North Dakota, grade school-aged kids dressed in army fatigues wield swords and conduct military field maneuvers. "A lot of people die for God and they're not afraid," one camper told ABC News reporters in a follow-up segment.

"We're kinda being trained to be warriors," added another, "only in a funner way."

Cain and the Intellectuals
Both Christian and secular critics assailed the makers of "Jesus Camp" for referring to the camp's extremist, militant Christianity as "evangelical." There is a name, however, that describes Kids on Fire's agenda, if you're familiar with their theology: Joel's Army. Pastor Becky Fischer, who runs the camp, said that a third of the kids at her camp were under 6 years old because they are "more in touch in the supernatural" and proclaimed them to be "soldiers for God's Army." Her camp's blend of end-times militancy and supernaturalism is perfectly emblematic of the Joel's Army movement, whose adherents believe their cause is prophesied in the Old Testament chapter titled "An Army of Locusts."The stark, evocative passages of that chapter describe a locust swarm that lays waste to Israel (to this day, the region suffers periodic locust invasions): "Like dawn spreading across the mountains a large and mighty army comes, such as never was of old nor ever will be in ages to come." As remarkable as the language is, most biblical scholars agree that it is a literal description of a locust invasion and resulting famine that occurred sometime between the 9th and 5th centuries B.C.E.

In the Book of Joel, the locust invasion is described as an omen that an Assyrian army to the north may attack Israel if it fails to repent as a nation. But nowhere is the invasion described as an army of God. According to an Assemblies of God position paper: "It is a complete misinterpretation of Scripture to find in Joel's army of locusts a militant, victorious force attacking society and a non-cooperating Church to prepare the earth for Christ's millennial reign."

The story of how an ancient insect invasion came to be a rallying flag for 21st-century dominonists begins just after World War II in Canada. Out of a small town in Saskatchewan, a Pentecostal preacher named William Branham spearheaded a 1948 revival in which he claimed that his followers lived in a new biblical time of "Latter Rain."

The most sinless and ardent of his flock would be called "Manifest Sons of God." By the next year, the movement was so strong — and seemed so subversive to some — that the Assemblies of God banned it as a heretic cult. But Branham remained a controversial figure with a loyal following; many of his followers believed him to be the end-times prophet Elijah.

Michael Barkun, a leading scholar of radical religion, notes that in 1958, Branham began teaching "Serpent Seed" doctrine, the belief that Satan had sex with Eve, resulting in Cain and his descendants. "Through Cain came all the smart, educated people down to the antediluvian flood — the intellectuals, bible colleges," Branham wrote in the kind of anti-mainstream religion, anti-intellectual spirit that pervades the Joel's Army movement to this day. "They know all their creeds but know nothing about God."

The Gates of Hell
Branham was killed in a car accident in 1965, but his Manifest Sons of God movement, the direct predecessor of Joel's Army, lived on within a cluster of hyper-charismatic churches. In the 1980s, Branham's teachings took on new life at the Kansas City Fellowship (KCF), a group of popular self-styled apostles and prophets who used the Missouri church as a launching pad for national careers promoting outright Joel's Army theology.

The Joel's Army movement began with the 1940s preaching of William Branham, whose group was banned as heretical by the Assemblies of God.

Ernie Gruen, a local pastor who initially promoted and gave citywide credibility to KCF pastors in the early 1980s, cut his connections in 1990. Concerned about KCF's plans to push its teachings worldwide, Gruen published a 132-page insider's account, based on taped sermons and conversations and interviews with parents who had enrolled their kids in KCF's Dominion school.

According to Gruen's report, students at the school were taught that they were a "super-race" of the "elected seed" of all the best bloodlines of all generations — foreknown, predestined, and hand-selected from