I do not seek sympathy but rather attempt to present as objectively as possible a factual account of my life and my experience with mental illness, the devastating and debilitating effect on my ability to function and the pain that I have inflicted on those I love and have loved. Of course there is something in this for me, it is my need to express myself and describe the lessons I have learned as well as pontificate on my values and philosophy. I will be sixty two this year and am South African

Yes, I have Bipolar Disorder which is a chronic illness and hell I don’t want this to sound like the famous introduction to an AA meeting. I was diagnosed on 22^nd August 1992 with Temporal Lobe Epilepsy. The diagnosis was subsequently changed to Bipolar 1. When was the onset of this debilitating and mystifying illness? I do not really know but with the benefit of hindsight it must have been in my late teens or early twenties

The elder of two male siblings, I had a fairly usual childhood except I was shy and introverted. My parents were loving but it was conditional love, do as we want and then we love you, be an individual and you are an indolent idiot, their friends and interests were paramount, more important than my needs. I have no anger or resentment and know they meant and wanted the best for me and in their psychological unaware manner they do love me. I had an amazing curiosity and showed an interest in the sciences and maths and my real passion was psychology, by the age of twelve I had read most of Freud’s writing, now of course so outdated. I mean how is it possible for a cigar to represent a phallus, no sorry Freud not relevant in today’s open and free society. My excessive curiosity caused me to be a prolific reader developing an extensive vocabulary and a good general knowledge

At the age of ten I had my first encounter with a psychologist. When disembarking from the school bus I developed this compulsion to place my foot under the wheel of the bus thereby crushing my foot. It was so disturbing I very shyly and ashamedly told my mother. Hence my visit to the psychologist, he did some tests one of which was an IQ and remarked “you are very smart, not mentally gifted but very smart” I thought he was crazy how could stupid me be smart!!!!!!!! Well I liked him as it felt so good to be told that stupid me could be smart and he very comprehensively explained to me the cause of my compulsion. The result, well I no longer had problems with the wheels of the bus

As for school, well that was school, it hampered my more important interests like sport and reading and my experiments with science, electronics and hypnosis, yes, I used to hypnotise my younger brother and hell that was such fun, if I told him it was cold he would shiver and if it was hot he would perspire and many other fun things, it was terrific, what a great life I had. Anyway I completed school by the age of seventeen, my grades a mediocre average, hell that psychologist was so wrong, I am not smart

At seventeen and a half I was conscripted and served in the infantry for nine months. Now please believe me the military is really different and soooo way out. It is very similar to the movies but to play the part of a rookie soldier at the mercy of a hardened instructor is absolute torture. There is the screaming, shouting, abuse, push ups, running, crawling, punishment, group punishment and of course the dreaded obstacle course. The first six weeks where ever you move you must run and of course you must salute commissioned officers but dare you salute a non-commissioned officer that is a fate worse than death. Now for a rookie it is very difficult to distinguish between a commissioned and non-commissioned officer. Yes, there is a plan, salute everybody, no that’s not the answer. Hang on a second, there is another plan; salute nobody, no that’s not the answer.

Now I am sure you are curious as to my rambling about this, well to explain, it is to illustrate that in the military whatever one does is wrong and is a punishable offence eliciting exacting physical punishment such as the obstacle course, push ups for extended periods, marching for hours and much else too numerous to mention

Now to the point I am trying to make. For the military to be effective every soldier must obey without question and comrades in arms must trust each other as well as act as a cohesive unit.

Examine the psychological dynamics used by the military and for the sake of simplicity I examine the component parts all applied simultaneously:

The extended periods of marching in column of three, left turn, right turn, about turn, halt, quick march, punish if not performed correctly, not precise, not fast enough. This is nothing more than operant conditioning; Pavlov would smile posthumously and say you see I was correct, military has achieved objective “obey without question”

Conscripts are drawn from diverse backgrounds, cultures, education levels and are individuals, military requires a cohesive group, so military breaks down individuality, punish for no valid reason, treat conscript unfairly, give conscripts a common anger and hatred, yes, the instructor is hated. Now what do we have, a group of rookies from diverse backgrounds with one common thread so powerful transcending all other differences , anger, outrage and hatred for instructor, result conscripts bond and become a cohesive unit. Military objective no two achieved, “cohesive and bonded group of soldiers”.

But wait, military afraid, what have we created, what if our unified creation in anger turns on instructor, we have a monster, military very afraid, military must outflank and outwit cohesive group of soldiers, comrades with such a common bond, military cannot have a mutiny

Yes, military have the answer; it is so diabolically simple, force this group of soldiers to be self controlling and censoring. Use group punishment. For those of you who do not know this concept, this is how it works: if one soldier steps out of line or errs punish his whole unit, yes, punish all for the error of one. That poor erring soldier will be bullied and beaten by members of his unit, he will endure such wrath from his comrades that never again will he step out of line. “There will never be a mutiny”

Military, you have won, objective achieved, hill captured, battle won

All the above I realised after my first month of military service, maybe that psychologist I saw when I was ten was correct, maybe I am smart, but no that cannot be, I am mentally ill, it had not manifested but was lurking for a time to strike

For the soldier, he is filled with pride in himself and his uniform, his country and flag, he walks tall; he has endured much and won, he serves his country or so he is told, what an honour??

On the 31^st December 1964 I completed my compulsory military service and despite my cynicism I was “brave and strong and true”

To end this post allow me to pontificate, from Secretaries and Ministers of defence to the lowest ranking instructor, we forgive you, and you know not what you do. You create efficient killing machines in the name of defending your country, your aim is to kill and maim and all this in the name “God and Country”, you are evil, you create evil. “Semper Fidelis”, “Unit, Corps, God, Country”, “Pro Deo Et Patria” and all that good stuff

My simple question is “why as civilised adults do we not use diplomacy, talk and understand each other, lay down our arms, disband all military, have peace and be friends” Violence and destruction is pathetic and in war there is no victor

My next post, well, who knows, I am a Bipolar

According to a US navy statement issued on Wednesday, the joint war games led by Britain's Royal Navy Commodore Peter Hudson have also brought together vessels from Britain and Bahrain and started Sunday.

Earlier in August, a large armada of US and European naval vessels were reportedly deployed to the Persian Gulf to reinforce the US strike force in the region. The deployment took place following a military operation, which saw more than a dozen warships from the US, Britain and France conducting war games in the Atlantic Ocean.

The current statement by the Bahrain headquarters of the US 5th Fleet claims that the joint maneuvers are aimed at better protecting coalition ships against vessels 'deemed threatening'. This comes as the West has intensified its go-to-war rhetoric against Iran.

The US, the UK and Israel are among countries that accuse Tehran of pursuing a military nuclear program and under such pretext have attempted to portray the country as a threat to regional and global security.

Washington and Tel Aviv have repeatedly threatened to launch military strikes against Iranian nuclear facilities should the country continue with its uranium enrichment program.

This is while the UN body responsible for monitoring Iranian nuclear activities has confirmed that Tehran enriches uranium-235 to a level of 3.7 percent - a rate consistent with the construction of a nuclear power plant. Nuclear arms production requires an enrichment level of above 90 percent.

In reaction to Western threats, Iran has started revamping its military hardware, supplying its navy with sophisticated military equipment, such as a high-tech weapons system, capable of targeting any vessel within a range of 300 km from its shores.

Another high-ranking military official in Iran has warned that Washington would not be faced with 'orthodox and classic tactics' should it attempt to engage in a war with Tehran.

Tehran has repeatedly warned that if the country comes under attack, it would not hesitate in taking necessary measures to protect its sovereignty, including the closure of the Strait of Hormuz.

Commodore Hudson stated that the war games dubbed 'Goalkeeper' are intended for practicing skills such as 'locating and tracking' vessels in the Persian Gulf and 'handling command and control' operations during a potential confrontation.

http://www.payvand.com/news/08/aug/1309.html

Russia Issues War Warning To NATO

As the attention of the America public is focused on the American election, with the Democratic Convention having just ended, and the announcement today of McCain's female running mate, and the Republican Convention next week, the public has missed something. Something not missed by Europeans, even mainstream European news media have given broad coverage to the story. 

 

Just a minor story, really, no need to turn your attention away from the political puff that is American electoral politics. Just something about Russia (you know the big country with tens of thousands of nuclear weapons and advanced delivery systems) and a clear WAR WARNING TO NATO.

 

In what is the most serious international crisis since the Cuban Missile Crisis almost caused World War III forty-five years ago, Russia has issued a War Warning to NATO and America. "If NATO suddenly takes military actions against Abkhazia and South Ossetia, acting solely in support of Tbilisi, this will mean a declaration of war on Russia," said the Russian Ambassador to NATO, Mr. Dmitry Rogozin. Further, Russia is making it clear that military assistance to Georgia will be considered an act of war. Ambassador Rogozin likened the current crisis to the fevered diplomatic atmosphere in Europe just before the start of the First World War. World War I was said to start when "the lights went out in the chancelleries of Europe" and diplomatic measures failed. 

 

A top Russian military figure, the President of the Academy of Geopolitical Studies (in Moscow) Colonel General Leonid Ivashov said "We are close to a serious conflict". With regard to the Georgia-South Ossetian conflict, General Ivashov said that one of the principal goals of NATO's "geopolitical operation" was to neutralize Russia as a global player in the run-up to a war with Iran.

 

The British publication, 'This is London', calls the Russian position, as articulated by Ambassador Rogozin, an "extraordinary warning to the West".

 

Another leading London newspaper, 'The Mail', said "Tensions between Russia and the West were ratcheted even higher today after Moscow warned that the American naval build-up in the Black Sea could be seen as a 'declaration of war'."

 

While I am not heading for the nuclear bomb shelter, I do think that this is serious. One of the main fears has been what the crazy neo-con Administration of George Bush and Dick Cheney would do in its final months in power. Would they begin yet a third war, this time with an Iran armed with advanced biological weapons of mass destruction capable of killing maybe a third of the human race? The answer to that is still up in the air, but it appears that the overall answer is much worse than anyone thought.

 

The Bush Administration funded a buildup of the Georgian Army and recently sent about a thousand US Marines to train the Georgian troops. Israel and the United States sold a large amount of military technology and hardware to Georgia. Israeli companies, headed by reserve Israeli generals, brought in excess of a thousand Israeli mercenaries into Georgia and two senior, recently retired Israeli generals provided senior command "consulting" to the Georgian General Staff. All of this turned very ugly, when on 8/8/08 the Georgian forces attacked lightly armed Russian peace keepers along with many innocent Russian civilians using volley fire from massed tubeless artillery. Over 1,400 men, women, and children were killed in their own homes without warning, in the opening minutes (with over 2,000 killed in the five day war). In response to this, Russia sent in her troops and most Georgian troops retreated (some "retreated" so fast that they threw away their uniforms, guns, and equipment as they ran home). 

 

The Russians, by most accounts, behaved well and stopped short of the Georgian capital. However, to hear the neo-con political leaders in the United States, France, and the United Kingdom tell it, the Russians attacked a defenseless nation that had done nothing to provoke the attack. Increasingly the neo-con owned mainstream news media is spinning the story into one of Russian aggression, making the Russians out to be the bad guys and ignoring the murder of thousands of civilians by the Georgian/Israeli forces. 

 

Russian's deputy military chief, Col. Gen. Anatoly Nogovitsyn, has warned that NATO has already exhausted the number of naval forces it can have in the Black Sea under the Montreux Convention (an international treaty dating to 1936 that governs the number, type, and tonnage of warships allowed to pass the Turkish Straits ~ the Bosporus and the Dardanells ~ into the Black Sea) and warned Western nations against sending more ships. The Montreux Convention allows the NATO ships to stay no longer than 21 days and limits the total number to nine warships (the current number).

 

If the Convention treaty is violated by NATO it will be a technical state of war. Russia has warned Turkey that she will be held responsible if additional warships are allowed into the Black Sea; already Turkey has prevented some US naval ships from entering. The total tonnage limit on naval ships is 45,000 tons. The US sought to send the USNS Comfort and the USNS Mercy, hospital ships whose tonnages both exceeded 69,000 tons each, through the Turkish Straits but Turkey would not allow it. As the hospital ships are not really needed, this was simply an attempt by the Bush Administration to violate the Montreux Convention and to get by with it by insisting that no rational nation could object to hospital ships. General Nogovitsyn has pointed out that US Navy ships in the Black Sea have nuclear armed cruise missiles capable of striking at most of European Russia including St. Petersburg and that these ships are considered "a serious threat to our security".

The Russians suspect that the US Navy is delivering arms to Georgia under the cover of civilian aid. Russian Foreign Minister Sergei Lavrov has said, "Normally battleships do not deliver aid and this is battleship diplomacy, this does not make the situation more stable".

Russian Admiral Eduard Balin (former commander of the Russian Black Sea Fleet) was quoted by Russian news media as saying, "Despite the apparent strength of the NATO naval group in the Black Sea....a single salvo from the Moskva missile cruiser and two or thee missile boats would be enough to annihilate the entire group. Within twenty minutes the waters would be clear." The Moskva is the world's only currently serving 'heavy battle cruiser' and the most powerful non-carrier surface ship in the world. 

 British neo-con leader, Prime Minister Gordon Brown will attend an unprecedented emergency summit of leaders of the EU's 27 member states this coming Monday, in Brussels, to discuss the EU's response to Russia's actions. Sanctions are expected to be on the agenda to punish Russia for its "aggression". Fears are being expressed in Europe that Russia may restrict oil deliveries to Western Europe over the next few days, in response to the threat of EU sanctions and NATO actions in the Black Sea. This would be a dramatic escalation of the Georgian crisis and would play hell with global oil markets.

 

In a related story, Lebanese television and other sources are reporting that the Israeli government has reached a "strategic decision on Iran". That Israel will strike Iran, eventually (alone if necessary). The Jerusalem Post says that the Israeli government is moving forward with plans for the purchase of special aircraft and working on receiving US government approval to use US controlled Iraqi airspace for an attack on Iran.

 

It is interesting that more and more publications, from the right, center and left (including pro-neo-con and anti-neo-con), are speaking of World War III. An interesting article by Stratfor (generally pro-Israel and pro-neo-con) and reprinted by finchannel.com (a strongly pro-neo-con publication) speaks of Turkey's Options in the coming Third World War. 

 

What the crazy evil Bush/Cheney Administration has done is to move the world close to World War III by bringing the Russians into the neo-con ever growing nightmare of war; 8/8/08 was the Russian 9/11 brought to you by the same people who gave America its 9/11, Britain its 7/7, etc. 

 

There are various theories as to why the United States (or more specifically why the neo-cons who control the US government) would want to push Russia into a global war; just as there are various theories why tiny Israel would want to involve itself in a battle against a massive nuclear power like Russia, who could turn Iran and Syria into nuclear armed states overnight if it chose to. 

 

Many say that the neo-cons are simply crazy and that their maneuvers have failed. Others would say that the neo-cons are simply pawns in a larger Grand Strategy game that the global banking families have been playing for a couple of centuries and that a Third World War is required to establish the New World Order/global government that they intend to establish and establish soon. If the latter is the case, a little thing like advanced 21st Century warfare will get in the way. There is simply NO WAY that mankind can survive a Third World War, except for Divine intervention. The levels of destructive firepower and technology are simply too great.

 

Stirling

rense.com/general83/natoh.htm

Dutch Intelligence Helped Prepare Imminent Attack On Iran

Biggest Newspaper In Holland Says Dutch Intelligence Helped Prepare Imminent Attack On Iran
De Telegraaf front page says sources inside AVID helped CIA map air attack.

The biggest Newspaper in the Netherlands today devotes its front page to news that the Dutch intelligence agency has helped the CIA prepare for an air attack on Iran which it now believes is imminent.

AVID, Holland's military intelligence service, has pulled back from operations it was carrying out inside Iran as it believes an American led attack will go ahead within weeks according to De Telegraaf's sources.

The headline reads:

"AIVD is calling back spy because of US plans
ATTACK ON IRAN IMMINENT"

De Telegraaf reports that the decision has already been made by the U.S.
to attack Iran using unmanned aircraft. Potential targets are said to be nuclear facilities and military installations. The latter have been mapped by the CIA with the help of the Dutch secret service.

A portion of the article reads:

Good sources have declared to the Telegraaf that the AIVD has been operating in Iran for the last few years with the purpose of the infiltration and sabotage of the weapons industry of the Iranian republic.

The operations are said to have been "very successful" but have recently been put to a halt because of american plans for an air attack. Information regarding the AIVD operation has been shared with the CIA in recent years according to the sources.

Iran is probably working towards an atomic bomb and refuses to comply to western demands to stop enriching uranium. In june Israeli vice president Shaul Mofaz made the statement that an Israeli attack is inevitable if Iran continues its quest for atomic weapons.

http://www.telegraaf.nl/binnenland/1796098/Aanval_op_Iran_verwacht.html?p=2,1
http://infowars.net/articles/august2008/290808Iran.htm

Russia will not be isolated because it protected its citizens and upheld its peacekeeping mission, the Russian Prime Minister Vladimir Putin has said. In an interview on German TV, Putin suggested that if Russia had not responded to Georgian aggression, there could have been a tragedy along the scale of what happened in the former Yugoslavia.

“I think a country like Russia, that protected its citizens, and fulfilled its peacekeeping duties, won't be held in isolation, no matter what our partners think within the limits of their bloc. Europe and the U.S. are not the whole world,” he said.

He recalled the Srebrenica massacre, when thousands were killed when Dutch peacekeepers didn't intervene in the Balkan war.

The Prime Minister insisted that the Georgian government should be held responsible for its action.

“Speaking about the Georgian leadership, people who wreck the territorial integrity and national identity of their country with their actions shouldn't be ruling that country, be it big or small. They should resign straight away,” he said.

”Of course, it's up to them, but we all remember the precedents that we have in history. Let's remember how U.S. troops entered Iraq, and what they did with Saddam Hussein for destroying several Shiite villages. Here, ten Ossetian villages were destroyed right out,” Putin told ARD TV.

"Aren’t you aware of what’s been going on in Georgia in the last few years? The mysterious death of Prime Mnister Zhvania, fighting with the opposition, the violent dispersal of protest demonstrations, holding a national election during a practical state of emergency, and now this criminal action in South Ossetia with many casualties. You call it a democratic country, negotiating with it, and thinking it should be admitted to NATO and the EU?"
 
Putin said the Georgian-South Ossetian conflict should be dealt within the frame of international law.

“We don’t have any special rules of our own by which we are going to play. We want everybody to play by the same rules. These are called international law. But we don’t want anyone manipulating them - playing it one way in one region, and another way in another region, to suit their own interests. We want to have the same rules for everyone, which would take into account the interests of all members of the international community”.

Putin underlined that Russia wants neighbourly relations with other countries.

"Russia isn't out to aggravate the situation, or to put pressure on anyone. We want good neighbourly relations and partnerships with everyone," he said.

http://www.russiatoday.com/news/news/29694

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Russia increases air activity near Canada

Canada is seeing an increase in Russian flights near its airspace in the Arctic as it seeks to strengthen its sovereignty in the vast resource-rich region, Defense Minister Peter MacKay said on Thursday.

“There have been a certain number of incidents recently that indicate a greater degree of activity on the part of Russia,” MacKay told reporters in the Arctic community of Inuvik. He declined to disclose the number of such flights.

MacKay said Canada had asked Russia to notify it in advance when it was planning military flights near Canadian airspace.

MacKay was in Inuvik for a meeting of the Conservative government’s major Cabinet members, as part of a swing through the region by Prime Minister Stephen Harper that has emphasized Canada’s sovereignty claims.

MacKay and Harper visited four CF18 Canadian military jets sent to Inuvik in response to what officials said was an unidentified aircraft that had neared Canadian air space.

http://www.dailytimes.com.pk/default.asp?page=20088\30\story_30-8-2008_pg4_3