Some.

In the end, though, I decided to write this blog simply because the whole situation was too awkward to not write about it.

As I mentioned a couple of weeks ago, Sarah and I have recently become members of the church we'd been attending. It's a great church and the people there have been way, way cool. From the first time we went there, people were coming up to us, introducing themselves, and making us feel at home. I've been in a few churches before as a guest and unfortunately, this is a pretty rare occurrence. But the people here have been nothing short of really amazing. Needless to say it wasn't a hard decision when considering becoming a member. (Of course, if you know me, then you know I don't have to mention the fact that the teaching there is great and the church is really trying to focus on doing what a church should be doing. I wouldn't be considering membership otherwise.)

The Sunday we became members, we had to speak in front of the congregation to introduce ourselves and give a bit of our background. I of course took this as another opportunity to make jokes in front of a group of people. Sarah was very nervous about having to speak in front of everyone but she was very cute and charming and her regular ol' irresistible self.

Afterwards people came up to us giving us hugs and welcoming us to the church. And the really weird thing? I could sense they were very genuine about it. It almost threw me off. What's that say about where we are as a people when it's hard to believe people being so nice?

It really was a great day and Sarah and I were made to feel so welcomed and appreciated. The only weird part of the day (if you know me, there's always a weird moment) was in the bathroom after the service. Guys, mostly older dudes, were telling me how they enjoyed what Sarah and I had to say and telling me how glad they were to have new members and how happy they were for us and patting me on the back.

Patting me on the back while I was using the urinal.

If you've never received a (literal) pat on the back while receiving a compliment while trying to aim, well then, you've never been so confused about what to focus on.

I have been trying for weeks to come up with a perfect topic to write about, and every night I do my best to come up with one with no success.  As I was lying in bed trying to fall asleep it finally came to me, fat people, especially fat men do not like it when someone comes up to them, pats them on the back and says "How's it going big guy?"  Actually this doesn't really apply to women.  I don't think anyone has ever said to a fat woman "How's it going large lady?"  Or "hey there big gal!" or "How you doing broad-backed babe?" (If I'm wrong ladies please let me know.) I have heard lots of times people calling my husband, brother, and father "Big Guy."

I'm not sure when it was decided "Big Guy" was an appropriate way to greet someone, but I'm pretty positive fat guys don't like it.  No one likes to have pointed out they are big even if it is true.  This greeting is usually done by a guy who is not big which makes it worse.  Like I have stated before, it is okay for fat people to make fun of themselves and other fat people like them, but is not okay for skinny people to do it.  The problem comes in the fact that the person doing the greeting doesn't think he is being offensive to the fat guy.  I think the skinny guy thinks he is being nice and doing the fat guy a favor by saying hello to him and giving the fat guy a nickname.

The other part of this greeting a fat guy doesn't like is being patted.  For some reason my husband is always getting patted on the back, arm or shoulder.  I understand these parts of my husband's body are large, but that does not mean they are meant to be a bull's eye for everyone to pat.  Fat people including women on this one generally don't like to be patted.  It causes the fat to jiggle and can be felt by the fat person as well as the non-fat person doing the patting.  Often seeing the sight of a person coming toward a fat person with his or her hand in the position of a tennis racket ready to strike a ball, causes the fat person to become tense waiting for the smack this then makes the whole greeting uncomfortable making the fat person seem anti-social, which then causes the patting, big guy-calling greeter to quickly say "Well, I'll catch you later."  The greeter tends to think, "Ah that was so nice of me to say hello to that poor awkward, fat person," and the fat guy tends to feel as though he has just been molested and insulted.  If you are a skinny guy reading this and have been guilty of greeting fat people in this way, just keep in mind, jiggling a person and pointing out to a person they are big is not an appropriate way to say hello.  Try a hand shake and using the person's name next time.

प्रश्न - साफ सुथरी, हरी भरी, अति सुंदर दिल्ली,
          देश के सब शहरों मैं प्यारी दिल्ली.
उत्तर - हाँ, यह भी आपने ठीक कहा भाई.

प्रश्न - यह किस दिल्ली की बात की आपने?
उत्तर - जहाँ मैं रहता हूँ भाई.

प्रश्न - और आम आदमी जहाँ रहते हैं,
          उस दिल्ली के बारे मैं आपकी राय,
उत्तर - मैं ऐसी किसी दिल्ली को नहीं जानता भाई.
           न ही शीला बहन ने ऐसी कोई दिल्ली दिखाई,
           कभी कभी विरोधी पक्ष करता है शिकायत,
           पर यह तो उन की आदत है भाई.

प्रश्नकर्ता - अच्छा नमस्कार.
प्रधान मंत्री - क्या इंटरव्यू ख़त्म?
प्रश्नकर्ता - जी हाँ.
प्रधान मंत्री - मैं समझा  नहीं भाई.
प्रश्नकर्ता - अगला प्रश्न तब, 
              जान जायेंगे आप जब,
              उस दिल्ली को जहाँ मैं रहता हूँ,
              दिल्ली का एक आम आदमी,
              जो नहीं है आपकी दिल्ली सी,
              साफ सुथरी, हरी भरी, अति सुंदर,
              जहाँ हमेशा रहती है विजली और पानी की किल्लत,
              जहाँ आदमी नहीं है सुरक्षित,
              न घर मैं, न घर के बाहर,
              जहाँ पुलिस से डर लगता है,
              मन कहीं और भाग जाने को करता है,
              जहाँ के वोट आपको जिताते हैं,
              पर जीत कर आप कह जाते हैं,
              मैं ऐसी किसी दिल्ली को नहीं जानता.